Jul 26 2010

Marriage advice for Chris Tomlin

Chris Tomlin announced last night that he is engaged! Congrats to Chris and his fiancee' Lauren! Any congrats or advice for the couple?

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Comments (38) -

7/17/2010 7:11:44 PM
Pam Preston United States
Pam Preston
Blessings on y'all! May you have many wonderful years together.
7/17/2010 7:12:14 PM
Brittany United States
Congrats Chris!
7/17/2010 7:12:22 PM
lance jonio United States
lance jonio
Congratulations Chris Tomlin and Laurn
7/17/2010 7:13:08 PM
Rebekah Krussow United States
Rebekah Krussow
Oh My GOSHHHH! Congrats!!! I screamed when I heard he was ingaged! YAYA BABY!! Smile Have an amazing, wonderful, God filled life married!! Laughing
7/17/2010 7:13:37 PM
Samantha Freer United States
Samantha Freer
Congrats!!! I actually found out that he was engaged the day after it happened. I was at the National Worship Leaders Conference in KC, KS and he announced it there but we were all told to keep it a secret so they could tell their families! Chris is such a great guy. He told some amazing stories and you can tell he is definitely on fire to serve our Amazing God. He will make a wonderful Godly husband! Congrats to him and his future wife!
7/18/2010 12:15:54 AM
Karl Brewer United States
Karl Brewer
Shortly before I was married, an old minister told me "Young man, every bachelor doesn't know how good of a life until he gets married - and then it's too late". Not sure what to say next, I asked how long he had been married and he said 30 years. Well, my wife and I celebrated 36 years in June so I figure I can pass along the wisdom. I hope Chris and his future wife a long and happy life serving the Lord together.
7/18/2010 12:35:03 AM
Terry S. Hewlett United States
Terry S. Hewlett
To You

I wake up, see you, smile
  Thank God for our first
Year  together  as one
  And when day is done
Our Love is strong

One year together as wedded
  Man and wife
All I can hope is that
  The Lord will bless our life

To You, my Love I vow

Coming in from work I
  Meet you at the door
Together now for five years
  Can we hold on for anymore
Bills to pay
    A child on the way
Blessings from the Lord
  To help us for the day

To You, my Love I vow

Twenty years together now
  I’ve seen your worst
                You’ve seen mine
Funny how our worst
  Is still to us just fine
Kids are grown, about to leave
  The nest will be lonely once more
But you’re with me
    And I’m with you

To You, my Love I vow

To hold you,
    To help you,
        To love you
  No matter what
Through bad and good,
  Up and down
    Sick days and health days

To You, and only You
    My Love I vow

Twenty Five years and then
  Its been Thirty, seems
Like it was just yesterday
  When it was just one
Never thought we would look back
  From here and see that it
Can be done

Keep Love for God
  Keep Love for each other
Give to each other room to
  Breathe and never smother

And to You, my Love I vow

Here we are at our milestone
  Thirty Five years we have
Traveled together
  Thirty Five years as one
Memories are turning to gold
  Friends we have are now our old
      And best
How did we do it some have asked
  Requesting us to examine
    The past

Remember the day you took
  Each other by the hand
And in front of God you
  Chose to stand
And speak some special chosen
  Words, and made one
Special promise from your soul
    To keep,

To You, My Love I Vow.


7/18/2010 12:37:35 AM
Gloria Cissom United States
Gloria Cissom
Marriage is like a rope, it has to have 3 strand to be strong and to withhold anything that comes against it.  One strand is you, Chris, and the other is your future bride, the 3rd strand is God and just like that 3 strand rope without the 3rd strand your marriage is not as strong. So always make sure that 3rd strand is intertwined and you will have a strong marriage.
7/18/2010 1:02:30 AM
Nina United States
Congratulations Chris and Lauren.  May you have all the blessings.  Love your music.
7/18/2010 1:12:17 AM
Keith Allen United States
Keith Allen
Congrats to Chris and his fiancee' Lauren.  I have been maried to my best friend for 27 years. Oh yah, we have our differences, but I love her more every day! I learned by my parents mistakes to not use the words NEVER and ALWAYS when in a heated discussion.  Both words are exaggerations and turn up the heat. Love is working at keeping the covanent you made with your spouse and the lord.  It is all about "caring" for your spouse, even when you feel you don't care, so don't go to sleep at night with your differences keeping you apart.  GOD bless your glorious union.  
7/18/2010 1:12:22 AM
Brian Gould United States
Brian Gould
My wife and I have been through alot together like most, but what saved our marriage is God of course, and the "Love & Respect" course for couples. Amazing, Does not matter what stage your marriage is in it will transform the way you think about Men and Women=]
7/18/2010 1:16:43 AM
Roxanne United States
Congrats to Chris and Lauren!  God Bless you both!
I am a photographer, and did a wedding for a couple this past weekend where the bride sang a song to the groom; she did pretty good, but he cried!  Also I did my son and daughter in-law's pictures 2 years ago; it was the hardest wedding I've ever done; I did pretty good until my son started to cry during their vows, and then I lost it, and we were all crying!  Pictures still turned out good, and I got a great daughter in-law, and now have 2 beautiful grandchildren!  God is Awesome!  Congrats again to Chris and Lauren.
In Christ,
7/18/2010 1:18:41 AM
christina whitfield United States
christina whitfield
God bless you, I pray that the love between you both grow more and more each day. always listen to one another. bless you Chris and Lauren and bless the ministries God has given you both.
7/18/2010 1:21:45 AM
Rosie Posie United States
Rosie Posie
Congratulations!!!  I would like to start by saying I truly enjoy Chris' music.  He is by far my favorite Christian singer.  Next, I would like to give a word of advice...  Marry me instead!!  just kidding.  It is important to keep laughing, loving and worshipping in a marriage.  My husband, Steven and I have just celebrated our 28th anniversary.  I try to show my appreciation and respect to him every day.  He is a very giving man, he is retired and takes care of our home.
Please don't forget to say "thank you", "I appreciate you", and other important phrases that let you know you admire each other.  Notice the small things that your spouse does.  And if you are ever in San Antonio, TX, please come visit me!!   GOD Bless you both with many years of happiness, lots of children and abundant Love.
7/18/2010 1:23:46 AM
Jessi United States
Congrats to Chris and best wishes to the couple and God Bless!!!
7/18/2010 1:37:40 AM
Adam Yungeberg United States
Adam Yungeberg
Many congratulations and prayers go out to Cris and Lauren.  My wife and I do a devotion every night before we go to bed.  "Night Light" by Dr. James and Shirley Dobson is highly recommended.  It has opened our eyes on many things and brought us closer together and closer to God as well.
7/18/2010 1:43:23 AM
Emmi United States
Congratulations to both couples!

We just had a class yesterday in church with a theme of dating and marriage, so now I have some fresh hints to give!

One good hint is to keep on dating while married.
Go on real dates, pamper your "better half" and continue on getting to know each other.

Discuss about everything with patience and kindness. Remember the list of virtues in the Bible?

Learn how to keep your mouth shut. The longer you have known each other, the more you also know weak points of one another. So don't hit "under the belt", so to say.

Make sure that while you grow even more in love with each other, you also grow more in love with Jesus. A healthy Christian relationship lets both grow better in serving God and people around you.

Remember Proverbs 2 about wisdom and the adulteress. Search for wisdom and pure heart, pray for it, and God will give them to you.

I hope these help and lots of love to you,
7/18/2010 2:05:08 AM
Lauren United States
I got married back in September and we had everyone sing Chris Tomlin's song you just played of "How Great is Our God" as a praise song during our ceremony. Such a perfect song for our wedding!
7/18/2010 2:30:09 AM
alana United States
Besides the Bible - EVERY couple, married or considering ever being married needs these two books:
The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
Personality Plus for Couples by Florence Littauer
pg 67, Chapter: Popular Sanguine, Yours Truly is the first word of the chapter and my stories are featured in the chapter *cheesy grin*.

When you know your loved ones' love languages and personalities (children included) - life is so much easier b/c you UNDERSTAND them and know how to fill their love tank!
This advise was FREE!
Alana Donovan, Brandon, MS
7/18/2010 8:39:34 AM
Leandra United States
I thought Chris was already married!  
That is sooooooo cool that he is engaged!  
How old is he?  
Anyway, Congratulations Christ TomlinSmile
7/18/2010 8:42:25 AM
James United States
After 21 years of marriage, I thought I'd pass along some husband tidbits that I've learned.

- she is your best friend and mate ... she will be there before the kids AND after they leave home, so she is always the most important BEFORE the kids.  Yes, you love your kids, but your wife comes first, after God.  Remember that your life does not evolve around your kids.

- people can change themselves, but you cannot change them. Accept them as they are and love them.  But bad habits may not go away, so you cannot let something that get you angry, upset or anxious. Be the example and the leader in doing what you want done, and she will either accept it and follow it, or not, and you need to understand how important it is or is not.

- choose the important things to hold your ground and which things should be compromised or changed.  Remember you are not always right.  And ask for her advice often and take it. You married her for her intelligence, attitude, mannerisms, and life, as well as current beauty.  Make the most of them.  Beauty evolves - so should love.

- You're not a tyrant and not a master, but you are the leader of the house.  Whether you give her certain duties of the house/family/relationship, the final responsibility of how that works is still yours.  You have to answer to whether it is done correctly or not.  Don't assume she knows or will do it like you "always have."  Her method may be better, worse, or just different. If it gets done or it is still correct, don't correct her - let her do it her way.  Look at it from her point of view and you may find out that she does it better or the new method is best.

- God is the head coach. You're the quarterback and she is your receiver, defender, cheerleader, best friend, confidant, lover, best fan. Learn to always appreciate it, especially when all the limelight is on you. Learn ways to show it whenever possible.  And if you have to make time in a calendar to show it to her, then do it. Don't assume she knows - she may need constant reminders.  Find her hot buttons that she needs to keep her "love tank" full and then use them.  Read the 5 love languages by Gary Smalley together and apply them.

- Pray often. Together and apart. For each other and for God to keep you growing as a husband, father, lover and best friend for her. Then do it.
7/18/2010 9:04:56 AM
Ted Simpson United States
Ted Simpson
Well, if you've ever heard Chris sing a Christmas song or a love song to Christ, it can easily move you to tears.  If I were Lauren, I would strictly prohibit him from singing at my wedding.  He would make me cry.  My family would cry.  So would his.  Then the wedding party and guests would cry.  If the people working our wedding also cried all over the guests and couldn't see what they were doing, it would be a sad (happy) sight!  Please, Chris, no singing!
7/18/2010 2:57:36 PM
Karen United States
We have been married over 21 years.  I just read "Same Kind of Different as Me" by Denver Moore and Don Hall.  It made me want to be a better wife.  This book appears on the surface to be about working with the homeless--don't be fooled, it is also about relationships and marriage and how to live and how to die...it is a beautiful, moving book.  Read it together.  Chris, thank you for your music.  Your lyrics always seem to say what I need to hear or to have affirmed.  We look forward to hearing the depth that your relationship together brings to your ministry.  Blessings!
7/18/2010 4:19:07 PM
Lesley Depriest United States
Lesley Depriest
Congrats Tom and Lauren!!!
I just wanted to say that the most important key to marriage is to keep Christ the center of y'alls marriage. You can never say "I love you" too much and remember that communication is very important!!
7/19/2010 12:34:37 AM
James Yoon United States
James Yoon
I just heard a million women... sobbing.  Congratulations!
7/19/2010 1:13:24 PM
Bonnie Cheatham United States
Bonnie Cheatham
Chris and Lauren, As my husband and I prepare to celebrate 45 years of marriage, we are also celebrating your engagement.  Marriage is a wonderful union of two people in love but it is also hard work. I believe that our faith and love of God and keeping Him the center of our marriage has been key to its success.  We also believe that you need to continue "date nights".  Even when we first got married and had 2 sons and very little money, we would go to the local Denny's once a month for a cup of coffee and a piece of pie so we could focus on each other.  And third, remember that you are also individuals who do have different things they like to do - I am a quilter and my husband loves to ride his horse (so far he has not found a horse to carry my sewing machine). Celebrate your differences and your togetherness.  God Bless you both. May you have a long and happy life together.
7/19/2010 3:48:46 PM
Chris United States
Marriage is of course one of God's greatest gifts! I have found in my marriage some things that seem to really help:

1. The husband is the spiritual leader and needs to always be leading her to Christ. Listen and take to heart every comment she says about her faith, and use it as a guide for the direction to take her.
2. Family first. I'm sure it's difficult to be a married touring musician, but she comes first. As a minister myself, I realize ministry is weak if family ministry is not strong.
3. Read and study Ephesians 5 in its proper context. There is no better summary of the best way to run a family, although it is easier stated than done.
4. When conflict comes up, know the things that calm each other down. (For my wife, it's a hug, a kiss, and a diet coke. It's an automatic cure for high tension.)
7/19/2010 9:26:55 PM
KT United States

NEVER take each other for granted and rememeber that you also cannot think that you've reached the point that "you've made it".  

Satan's goal is to break up Christian couples and families, especially ones that hold the eye of the world, which yours will be.  So stay humble and in prayer for the LORD's protection over your marriage.  Listen and pay attention to each other, "leaving and cleaving" and enjoy your new life...together...FOREVER!!
7/19/2010 11:35:38 PM
Rebecca United States
I am so happy for Chris Tomlin!! I was actually wondering if he was actually going to get marriedSmile Chris Tomlin is one of my favorite singers EVER! CONGRADULATIONS!LaughingLaughingLaughingLaughingLaughingLaughingLaughing
7/19/2010 11:36:59 PM
Rebecca United States
I had to tell my entire family about this!! I'm SOOOO happy 4 him!!!!!!!!!!Smile
7/21/2010 2:28:29 PM
Margaret United States
I was listening to KLOVE last night when I was working and I heard that Chris Tomlin is FINALLY getting married!!I am so happy to hear that,because marriage is a very special part of life.
So,Chris,if you get to read these messages,I have a very important piece of advise for you.
My husband and I have been married for over 8 years and have been through so much in our lives together.Chris,Lauren,do everything together.Whatever you do,do together.I am the main wage earner in our household,I ALWAYS include my husband in all decisions we have to make.Never exclude the other person from making decisions.Whatever happens in our lives,it effects us both,not just me,not just my husband.GOD has seen us through some really tough times the last few years.It was our "togetherness"that made the difference.Some couples that we know,ended their marriage with less touble in their lives than we had.If you can FULLY trust your life with Lauren,then spend the rest of your life with her.I FULLY trust my life with my husband.When everyone turns against you,you will have a person that you can turn to,Lauren.
May GOD RICHLY bless your relationship!
We are so very happy for both of you!
Looking forward to seeing you September 30th in Pittsburgh.
We will be there!
7/22/2010 5:50:44 PM
Valerie United States
CongraTS!!!! All I have to say is be patient, understanding and forgiving.
7/25/2010 12:25:34 AM
JL United States
You're marrying a sinner and so is she, so learn to forgive.  After 15 years of marriage I would say forgiveness is most important to a Christian marriage.
8/21/2010 9:40:03 PM
Stephanie United States
Love and Respect by Dr. Eggerich
9/15/2010 1:21:09 AM
Kate United States
Chris, I am so happy for you that the Lord finally brought that special woman into your life.  She is lucky to have such a godly man as her future husband.  It is encouraging to know that if you just keep your eyes on Jesus, He will give you the desires of your heart.  It is all in His perfect timing!  I pray that you have a blessed life together!  Congratulations!!
10/14/2010 9:28:28 AM
Anna United States
I am so happy that he has found someone he can share his life with! Congratulations! A union God has brought together! All the blessings to this couple! May the Lord give you both the strength to honor one another, marriage is a lot of work, just be honest and communicate with one another, we are not mind-readers!! Haha!! God blessings to you both!!
11/5/2010 2:41:07 PM
Filip Romania
what a great news!!! God bless the new family!!! Love you!!!!
12/27/2010 9:59:37 PM
anna knowles United States
anna knowles
i am soooo happy for you chris!!!! you are amzingg! your woan is really luck!!
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