Jan 14 2010

Love Dare - Day 9

Love Makes Good Impressions

 

Greet one another with a kiss of love.  – 1 Peter 5:14

 

You’ve covered some serous ground so far in this journey.  Learning to demonstrate aspects of love patience, kindness, and encouragement are not always easy but are certainly crucial to a healthy relationship.  So dealing with the way you greet your spouse each day may seem inconsequential, but this small issue carries surprising significance.

 

You can tell a lot about the state of a couple’s relationship from the way they greet one another.  You can see it in their expression and countenance, as well as how they speak to each other.  It is even more obvious by their physical contact.  But how much importance should you give a greeting?

 

The Bible has more to say about greetings than you might expect.  The apostle Paul took time to encourage his readers to greet one another warmly when they met.  In fact, near the end of his letter to the Romans, he asked fellow believers to greet twenty-seven of his friends and loved ones for him.  He even took time to list each one by name.

 

It’s not just about your friends, however.  Jesus noted in His Sermon on the Mount that even pagans speak kindly to people they like.  That’s easy for anyone to do.  But He took it a step further and said that being godly included being humble and gracious enough to address even your enemies with kindness.

 

This raises an interesting question.  How do you greet your friends, coworkers, and neighbors?  How about acquaintances and those you meet in public?

 

You may even encounter someone you don’t necessarily like yet still acknowledge them out of courtesy.  So if you’re this nice and polite to other people, doesn’t your spouse deserve the same?  Times ten?

 

It’s probably something you don’t think about very often – the first thing you say to him or to her when you wake up in the morning, the look on your face when you get in the car, the energy in your voice when you speak on the telephone.  But here’s something else you probably don’t stop to consider – the difference it would make in your spouse’s day if everything about you expressed the fact that you were really, really glad to see them.

 

When someone communicates that they are glad to see you, your personal sense of self-worth increases.  You feel more important and valued.  That’s because a good greeting sets the stage for positive and healthy interaction.  Like love, it puts wind in your sails.

 

Think back to the story Jesus told of the prodigal son.  This young, rebellious man demanded his inheritance money and then wasted it on foolish lifestyle.  But soon his bad choices caught up with him, and he found himself eating scrapes in a pigpen.  Humbled and ashamed, he practiced his apologies and tried to think of the best way to go home and face his father.  But the greeting he was expecting was not the one he received.  “While he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion for him, and ran and embraced him and kissed” (Luke 15:20).

 

Of all the scenarios this young man had played out in his mind, this was likely the last one he expected.  But how do you think it made him feel to receive his father’s embrace and hear his thankful tone?  He no doubt felt loved and treasured once again.  What do you think it did in their relationship?

 

What kind of greetings would make your mate feel like that?  How could you excite his or her various senses with a simple word, a touch, a tone of voice?  A loving greeting can bless  your spouse through what they see, hear, and feel.

 

Think of the opportunities you have to greet each other on a regular basis.  When coming through the door.  When meeting for lunch.  When saying good-night.  When talking on the phone.

 

It doesn’t have to be bold and dramatic every time.  But adding warmth and enthusiasm gives you the chance to touch your mate’s heart in subtle, unspoken ways.

 

Think about your greeting.  Do you use it well?  Does your spouse feel valued and appreciated?  Do they feel loved?  Even when you’re not getting along too well, you can lessen the tension and give them value by the way you greet them.

 

Remember, love is a choice.  So choose to change your greeting.  Choose love.

 

 

Today’s Dare

 

Think of a specific way you’d like to greet your spouse today. Do it with a smile and with enthusiasm.  Then determine to change your greeting to reflect your love for them.

 

 

For I have come to have much joy and comfort in your love.  (Philemon 7)

 

 

Material taken from The Love Dare by Stephen and Alex Kendrick, copyright © 2009 by B&H Publishing Group. Used by permission. Unauthorized reproduction in any format is strictly prohibited by law.

 

Click here to buy a copy of The Love Dare book.  

Click here for a free online journal for the full 40 day challenge.

 

Comments (84) -

1/14/2010 3:18:30 AM
no name 2 United States
no name 2
this love dare has been very hard for me, my husband hasnt even noticed i know i have fell off the wagon so to say we negative word toward him. Yesterday's dare was a bite hard it hard for me to be his cheerleader he is not employed at the moment i know he is doing his best to find a job and i should cheer him on and encourage him but its so hard. Just pray for me and my family that God will bring us back together
1/14/2010 4:34:14 AM
Navy Sailor, Mother & Wife United States
Navy Sailor, Mother & Wife
Yesterday was kind of hard. Hubby was in bad mood from work. But I did make it through with the dare. I cannot wait to see him tonight. Just reading today's dare made me realize how important it isnto greet him..... I'm excited!!!!
1/14/2010 4:39:35 AM
Nanners United States
Nanners
Dear no name 2, don't give up! God will help you! Really, He will. I will be praying for you. God will honor your heart. He WILL change it and your husbands. It has only been 9 days. I know it is hard, but always remember you are not alone. Smile
1/14/2010 5:01:44 AM
Christina United States
Christina
I am doing the love dare alone. My husband works out of town & is home on the weekends some. In good & bad times I have always been a Good Greeter. Last weekend, when he came home alot later than he should have, I had the choice to be upset with him or greet him with kindness. I chose to greet him with kindness & when I did it made things fall into place. It was My actions that determined how our weekend went.
1/14/2010 5:08:43 AM
Jen United States
Jen
My love has given up on our relationship completely.  We talked about the Love Dare finally last night and he feels it's a waste of time.  While he recognizes my kind and generous attempts to bring us back together, he feels our problems cannot be solved by the Love Dare.

Today i feel sick at heart.  I will continue the Love Dare, because I know God can make anything possible, but I know my love and he never says anything he doesn't mean...

Our problems seem insignificant today when looking at all the tragedy that's occurred in Haiti, but if you could include a small prayer for us also...I would am grateful...

much thanks,Jen
1/14/2010 5:17:53 AM
I tried United States
I tried
I am taking a moment to say, I have enjoyed this challenge and was very excited to see where this 40 days would take us.

On the first day of the dare, I asked my husband if he wanted to do this with me. He said he did and I thought he was serious about working on our marriage.

After day 8 of the dare, I stopped kidding myself and I am backing out.

I have had to literally babysit him each day and I feel like I'm nagging him instead of being an equal supporter in this venture.

I faithfully and actively completed each of the dares and I have really enjoyed them.
I especially like the positive and negative list. I was pleasantly surprised that my negative list was 3 times shorter than my positive. I felt very inspired. That is until I found out yesterday that my husband hadn't even thought about his lists nor did he plan on doing so.

I am not kidding myself any longer. I have been the glue that held our relationship together for the better part of our marriage and I've not seen a change in behavior from him through any of my attempts.

I am giving up. I do wish all the couples who are working hard at strengthening, mending or developing a more loving relationship together the best of luck and I will continue to pray for all of you and for this dare to be a great tool in your marriage.

  
1/14/2010 5:38:27 AM
Kay Kay United States
Kay Kay
Everytime I start to feel I cannot do this anymore, I read the comments and it gives me the strength and courage to go on.  My husband will not do this with me.  He has no desire to work or talk about our marriage. One of the things on my negative list was that he is having an "inappropriate" internet relationship.  I have not burned my list yet, but I am praying for God to help me. I will continue to do the Love Dare, I am praying for a miracle.  Please keep me and my husband in your prayers.  
1/14/2010 5:42:39 AM
julia United States
julia
dear jen
when i read your comment i am remined of two things:  "I know the plans i have for you," declares the LORD "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" Jeremiah 29:11 and "I can do all things through CHRIST who strengthens me" Phillippians 4:13  Have the strength of Christ when you do the love dare, and always remember never look at what's around you (remember Peter he was sinking) because God Almighty will pull your marriage through because He knows your future.  God Bless you Jen and your relationship i will be praying for you too.
1/14/2010 5:48:56 AM
TomiMommy United States
TomiMommy
To Jen:

I'll be praying for you today!  Never think that the tragedy of a failed marriage is insignificant in our Father's eyes.  Remember his eye is on the sparrow.  Your success in overcoming this with your spouse is very important to God and even though I'm a complete stranger, it is important to me.  Don't give up on your love.  God has a plan for you.  "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6.  Take care!  

Constantly praying,
TomiMommy
1/14/2010 5:52:03 AM
Ana United States
Ana
I let my husband glance over the list of things I appreciate about him.  He had a rough day and wasn't believing that he is a great man.  So I proved it to him with a long list of his positive character traits.  Is this cheating?  Did I jump the gun on another love dare?

I couldn't help it... I had to share it with him because it's so rare to see him down and out.  
1/14/2010 5:57:36 AM
Bob United States
Bob
Jen,
You are in our prayers... don't give up...
GOD is in control! Your love may have given up on your relationship... but have you? Some times a person has to "lose" something to appreciate it... and sometimes we don't really have something we think is ours... there is an old saying that goes something like... "release it and if it comes back to you, then you know it is yours..." Turn this over to GOD... and don't go back and pick it up... Trust him... if it is meant to be... and you don't give up... by day 40 you will see a change.

GOD Bless you all...
1/14/2010 6:09:50 AM
Billie United States
Billie
Day 9- greetings- my husband sends me a text message upon waking every morning that says "Good Morning Beautiful"! It just makes my day. I truly never get tired of seeing those three words pop up on the screen of my phone. Today, I have a card I bought on Day 3 that I've been saving . Since I have to go to work before he gets up, I'm going to leave the card for him as my special greeting . I have a good marriage already but the Love Dare is only making us stronger. Even ifyou don't think this is doing anything in your marriage, keep plugging along! God can do anything but he might choose to take the entire 40 days to show you the blessing! Keep going, keep loving, and keep praying!
1/14/2010 6:12:51 AM
Isabelle United States
Isabelle
Jen,
My heart feels for you and your situation. You are in my prayers and please do not give up. There is always hope. God bless you and your husband!
1/14/2010 6:14:15 AM
Tara United States
Tara
Day 7, Love Believes the Best was the most inlighting day for me so far. To think of us haveing 2 rooms to choose from. Two rooms that we can visit, positive or negative. It was a great moment for me. It opened a whole new idea that we have more power to make ourselves happy than we realize. And then today, that how we greet someone sets the mood for the day. So, choose to walk in the positive room, pull some words from the wall, and use those to greet your sponse. I find that I LOVE walking into the positive room and spending all day there.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    
1/14/2010 6:22:13 AM
Rebekah United States
Rebekah
I never really thought about how important it is to greet my husband with a loving attitude. I will admit that some days I have hard a time with the kids and by the time my husband comes home all I can do is snap at him, even though, I am not upset with him. So today I have prayed for patience and a kind voice with my son! I am excited to greet my husband with a loving heart and a smile!
1/14/2010 6:25:33 AM
Valerie United States
Valerie
I am a single 47 year old with no one to really try this dare on except my mom who I have been living with and helping to take care of. I have been feeling so sorry for myself lately because I don't have a partner in my life. I feel abandoned and lost at times. I try to keep a positive outlook and be cheery to those around me but it is hard. Please keep me in your prayers. I know God loves me but I feel abandoned and none of my prayers are being answered.
Valerie
1/14/2010 6:45:35 AM
Valerie United States
Valerie
I am basically doing the Love Dare alone.  My husband works out of town and comes home on the weekend.  He knows I am trying to do this and he doesn't notice the effort it takes.  I am home all week with two children, 2 and 6 and I am a full time student at college.  We talk every evening, but for only about 5 minutes...he's not a phone talker.  I hope to complete this task and grow in our relationship and my relationship with God.
1/14/2010 6:50:31 AM
Wes United States
Wes
For those that may need it: www.divorcecare.com

It's a Christ based method of healing from separation and divorce.
1/14/2010 6:56:38 AM
Laura Johnston United States
Laura Johnston
I am so sorry about all of the hardships and discouragement so many people are experiencing as they work on their marriages!!

Galatians 6:9 came to mind and I wanted to share it:

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
1/14/2010 6:57:32 AM
Aubrie United States
Aubrie
Lisa,
I listen to you and Eric every morning at work. I just heard you talking about running. I am a struggling runner, trying to get into shape to train for the Indy Mini (half marathon). I am living in Indianapolis as well and I thought I would encourage you to run the 5K that is in conjunction with the 1/2 marathon. It's on May 8th, and I believe registration is still open for it!

And for those struggling with the Love Dare in your relationships, I encourage you to keep going. I will be praying blessings on all of you in your relationships with your spouse, kids, friends, or whoever you are doing this for. Don't give up!
1/14/2010 7:02:28 AM
Wes United States
Wes
For those that may need it: divorce care is a Christ centered support organization for healing from separation and divorce.  I pray for all of you having trouble.  Don't give up.  With God, all things are possible.  Seek out divorce care groups online or at your church.  It is a great help.
1/14/2010 7:03:01 AM
Christine United States
 Christine
Jen
I know what you are going through.
It happen to our marriage, we both were on the point of giviong up.So we start praying together everynight.That was the best thing we ever done together.Our marriage is on a recovery path and we found new appreciation and love for each other.
We will include you both in our prayers,please don't give up. Give God time to work his ways.
Love is all that matters.
1/14/2010 7:13:19 AM
Tina United States
Tina
I'm having a really hard time doing the dare by myself. Sometimes I want to quit and honestly I have slacked off some because I haven't done the last couple days. I want to keep going and I want our marriage to be good, but the further I go on this dare, the more I see how much indifference my husband has for me. I know he doesn't hate me, but he sure doesn't act like he loves me at all.
I'm just feeling very sad today. I want things to work, but I don't know.....
I'm going to keep trying. Please pray for us.
1/14/2010 7:14:34 AM
Kaycee United States
Kaycee
Can I just say this journey on the Love Dare has been amazing.  I was listening to Lisa and Eric on the day it started and felt the Holy Spirit tell me to send this out to my family and friends so we could all work on our marriages together-some that are very troubled right now.  Let me just tell you that by me just doing what God told me to do and emailing this daily to everyone, I have seen some tremendous things happen in the marriages around me!  Thank you for doing this!  I'm excited to greet my hunny tonight!  Smile
1/14/2010 7:23:02 AM
TEXAN United States
TEXAN
this is for "I tried" -

Don't quit!!  Don't worry about his attitude - work on your own.  Do this by yourself and you will still see results!!

I will be praying for you.
1/14/2010 7:24:05 AM
Jamie United States
Jamie
It sounds like there are a few people who have left messages that they may give up.  I just want to encourage you to keep going.  Don't worry about if your spouse won't do the dare with you.  I think the Love Dare is more about focusing on unconditional love towards your spouse so it's irrelevant whether they're doing it with you or not.  In fact I'm glad I'm doing it alone because it allows me to focus on my behavior towards my wife and not hers toward me.  Remember how the movie Fireproof went?  His wife said she didn't love him anymore but he persevered regardless.  I encourage you all to keep it up!!  That's true love!  How your spouse reacts will be up to them.
1/14/2010 7:24:46 AM
Hope United States
Hope
Jen and all that are struggling.  Don't give up.  God has the last say.  My husband left me a year ago and up until New Years day we had some communication.  He has completely cut communication now.  He doesn't call no text no email nothing. But I still believe in God and I trust in Him.  I would give anything to do the love dare but it does require interaction and well thats a little hard. Continue to do it and when the 40 days are over start again.  You have him there physically and can still do it.  Don't worry about him doing it, you do it for your marriage.  God will see the things you do.  Do it for you and your marriage. God will touch his heart.  I will pray for all of you struggling because I do not want anyone to endure the pain I am now experiencing.
1/14/2010 7:32:22 AM
Michael Corbin United States
Michael Corbin
My wife and I are expecting anyday, we have had trouble keeping our heads above water and about a week and a half ago she went back to her moms. I have almost no way of contacting her, I send emails, but to no responce, I have gone by, left flowers, gift baskets, called her moms phone and I don't even know now when our baby is due. I have sent her the love dares, so she at least knows what i am doing and can if she wants. I keep asking God to speak to her where I can't. I've never been so alone, and yet the Dares are helping  anyway. I have no way to know if my efforts to regain my wife have been in vain or not, however, God has been a blessing to me, I can not breathe on my own right now, much less focus on anything but The Lord of Heaven has not only brought me peace, he has used the pain to smack me back to reality and realize How Selfish I had been Growing, and how much I had wandered from both my wife and My God. and then after compforting me, He has brought a string of non-christian men who are going through similar situations, and now I have the words to pass on to them to show the true Power of God to affect our lives. I ask for Prayer for my wife, Shira, my unborne daughter,Zoe, and all the people God is bringing in my life. And for continued strength not to let Fear, Anger frustration (as is my want) take control. And that God will surround Shira and encourage her and protect her, I miss my Family.
1/14/2010 7:43:06 AM
Jen United States
Jen
Dear Lisa and everyone who has offered support or said a prayer.  

This morning on my way to work, I was listening to KLOVE when Lisa shared a letter from the Love Dare, when she read it, I knew it was mine.  The tears streamed down my face as she talked about her own experiences and gave me encouragement.  I was so moved.  

I then got to work and signed in and so many of you had posted your thoughtful words and support.

I realize now that I am not alone, that no matter what happens, it will be ok.  I will give this over to God and prayer, continue to seek his council and I will pray for all of you who are doing this dare as well.  

What could be more powerful than love and prayer!

With much gratitude and a full heart,
Jen
1/14/2010 7:45:59 AM
John United States
John
Jen,
Lisa read your letter on the air this morning while I was driving to work. You asked us to pray for you. I promise that I will pray for you and your love everyday. Prayer is one of the ministries our God has laid on my heart, so know that I will pray for you continuously, that He will bless and heal both of you.  

John
1/14/2010 8:02:16 AM
Sandy United States
Sandy
Erica--Yesterday you talked about how your mother wasn't lalking to you because of your husband.  I know it's hard but I feel God will honor your actions toward working on your marriage.  We need to pray that God will change your mother's heart toward you and expecially your husband.  I know God can do it.  He changed my mother's heart.

To everyone who is doing the dare--I love reading your comments and look forward each day to see how you're doing.  I know I'm not alone.  Keep going.  Remember, it may take the whole 40 days.  Don't give up.  I'm praying for you.
1/14/2010 8:02:24 AM
Jenn United States
Jenn
I have joined in on this and done the best I can given my situation.
My husband and I are currently legally separated and he is in Iraq for 1 year. He is at a point where he doesn't speak to me much if at all. I leave him Instant Messages or mail things to him as part of my dares. Sometimes this is the only way I have to perform them.
Today I got an email from him saying he is done and ready to move on and he doesn't want to hear about how much I love and miss him.
This hurts so much but I refuse to give up. I am also reading Love & Respect (a great book), it has been a huge eye opener to me and I just pray for God to give me more Faith, Trust and Obedience in HIM. That my husband's heart will soften and he will become willing to try to work on our marriage.
1/14/2010 8:09:57 AM
David United States
David
Dear I Tried

Please don't give up on it yet. I did this on my own over the summer. It is really hard when the person you are with does not try and do it with you. You feel like you are all alone in your struggle but you aren't. I mad it to the end and God has worked a miracle in me and my wife's life. So I encourage you all to not give up. God i working but it takes time. God bless you all.

David
1/14/2010 8:52:16 AM
Jackie United States
Jackie
Hi Jen,

I just wanted to say your not alone...I'm in the same situation as you. I've been separated from my husband for almost 5 months now and its been so hard...I want my marriage to work and my husband has given up on us and says that its not going to work. Since the time we got married its been nothing but hard ache. I was pregnant with twin babies and lost them at 21 weeks. They lived for a few hours and died in my arms... I fell into this major depression, I had given up with life...I became this person who was always depress, angry, sad all the time, miserable, I treated my husband so mean. I didn't want to but i did. I had question God "Why me"..."How could u do this"... Since that time everything went down hill with my marriage. I will be praying for you Jen and everyone else who's going through a difficult time in there marriage and pray for a miracle that our marriages would work... May God bless you all and please pray for me and my husband that we can be a family again and that my husband would open his heart to God...

Jackie
1/14/2010 9:07:45 AM
Carole United States
Carole
If you watch the movie Fireproof, you will be inspired.  I'm secretly taking the love dare and I text msg it each day to my daughter who is also secretly taking it.  God strengthens us when we need Him most and for those who are stuggling, keep praying.  God DOES change peoples hearts, I've witnessed it first hand.  Don't give up.  Give all you have and more.  You will see the results!
1/14/2010 9:10:45 AM
Tabitha United States
Tabitha
For all of you struggling with the Love Dare and your marriages, please know it DOES work. Do not give up on it or your marriage. And do not forget to pray about it daily. I say this coming from the other end of the challange.
Two months ago I left my husband over some very serious trust issues we were having, on top of feeling like our Love was lost. I was done. I moved out and moved on. I was living with friends who were guiding me toward sin and wordliness. I was convinced things would not change. Then my husband asked me to watch the movie "Fireproof" and then told me he had started the Love Dare. He told me daily that he had changed but I refused to believe it. He continued to complete each days challange despite my hostility and hate towards him. When he did nice things for me I did not believe he was being sincere. But he did not give up on me or our love.
Finally we were at our breaking point. He told me to make a choice, divorce or to give him another chance. I decided to pray about it and I thank God everyday that I made the choice to forgive him and move back home. Now I can see that he really has changed and his attitude toward me is completely different then it ever was, even from the very beginning of our marriage. We have now started the Love Dare over together.
I urge all of you who feel discouraged, keep praying and keep trying. Only the Lord can make these miracles happen. The Love Dare works, and more importantly, the LORD works.
1/14/2010 9:15:37 AM
julia United States
julia
to all who think the love dare isn't for you because your single or going thru a divorce or even seperated from your spouse think again... have a better relationship with God our Father---learn who you are in Christ and understand things around you may look bad because a loved one doesn't notice your changing from the inside out Christ knows.  he knows your heart, and he knows your trying.  sometimes you need to love yourself first before you can love someone else.  please don't give up because Jesus didn't give up.
1/14/2010 9:22:17 AM
Christina United States
Christina
I am physically, mentally, and emotionally broken and feel like I am in nothing but bondage with my husband.  I have been doing the love dare everyday and will continue but this all is not working I can barely stand to see him after the cruel things he says to me every night.  I will continue with the strength the Lord is providing me, but I definetly need prayer.  I dont now how long I can hang on.  21 years of marriage on the 18th of this month is seeming like a waste of my life and that it has done me harm and no good.  I thank everyone for their comments I read them daily and it keeps me going.
1/14/2010 9:34:39 AM
yeny rosales United States
yeny rosales
AWWHH!!! it's so easy to get discouraged... but remember that we must not!!! I want to let everyone know that we came across KLOVE and this dare for a purpose that only GOD knows... Please continue to pray to pray for each other and continue to make GOD, love and relationships the center of our everyday life. We are hungry for love. We need to learn how to love.
God bless.
1/14/2010 9:42:16 AM
Christine Cline United States
Christine Cline
I first read this book right after I was divorced and a single parent of 4.  I had no one to practice on, but I still mediated on the words of wisdom it provides.  I recently remarried and have used what I learned to strengthen our relationship.  I don't expect my spouse to join me on this dare; Why? because my success in this is not dependent upon my spouse. I use this as a review, and since KLOVE has started the dare I have posted it on my facebook profile to share with all of my friends the amazing message.  I DARE you to Do all of the 40 day dares and see what the result is!
1/14/2010 9:42:34 AM
Doris United States
Doris
I was in a mood this morning and said a lot of negativity.  Love is difficult for us all.  I'm trying to expand my appreciation room as it is very small.  I remind myself that God loves him even when I cannot and pray that I will see my special person (formed in God's image) the way that God does with love.  I also have to remind myself that it is not all about me.LOL  Doris
1/14/2010 9:45:52 AM
Kay United States
Kay
For those of you who feel there is no hope for your marriage there is hope!  My husband and I were separated for 5 mos.  Everyday I prayed to God to bring my husband home and to restore my marriage. After a few mos. of being separated my marriage seemed even more hopeless.  As time passed by I never quit praying for a miracle, for God to soften and change my husband's heart.  I gave it all to God!  I had to learn patience and I had to learn to be still and realize God was doing a work even though I saw no results.  As time passed by after 5 mos. I felt it was time for me to give up. I felt as if it were God's will for my husband to not come back.  I knew in my heart that God had a plan, it's just so hard to sit back and be patient.  The weekend I finally decided to give up was the first weekend in Dec.  On the following Monday morning I got a text from my husband that said please don't give up on me yet!  I was stunned. From that day on we have been back together.  Not every day is easy, but we are both willing to do whatever it takes to hopefully make out marriage stronger than ever.  When I heard the Love Dare on KLOVE I asked him if he would be interested in us doing it together.  He immediately said he would and I can honestly say that God is doing a work in our relationship.  We are learning things about each other we never knew.  I am very hopeful that at the end of this 40 day journey that our marriage will be stronger than ever.  For anyone that is thinking about giving up on their marriage or on doing the Love Dare, don't. Remember that God is in control and he already has a plan!
1/14/2010 9:49:39 AM
Dalaina United States
Dalaina
Michael - You are in my thougths and prayers this morning, along with you wife and daughter.  I am amazed by your attitude and strength.  It is evident that God is working in you!  Don't let Satan get you down, continue on in Christ's strength.

Jenn - Don't let your husband's words discourage you.  It always seems that Satan fights the hardest when great things are happening.  The more I get my life on track, the more obsticles I must face.  As my husband and I work on our marriage and grow closer to each other and to God, it seems the moresSatan throws things at us!  Stay strong and keep loving!

My husband and I are going through a difficult time in our marriage.  My husband is dealing with a disease the dr's have diagonsed him with.  I have often found myself short tempered and frustrated with my husband.  The farther I go through the love dare, the more I realize all the feelings I have about the disease (the frustration, anger, resentment,...) I have taken out on my husband.  I know he didn't ask for the disease and I am believing and claiming a healing for him!  I'm taking my marriage back!  Satan is not going to steal my family.  This is my second marriage - in my first I didn't turn to God when things hit a hard place and now my daughters, ex husband, and I will have to live with those consequences for the rest of our lives.  I refuse to hand my marriage over to satan again!  

In the past year and a half, my husband has gotten saved and is not the man I married!  God has done an amazing work!  I praise God for the changes He's done in my life, my husband's life, and the work He is doing in my marriage!
1/14/2010 9:58:36 AM
sharon United States
sharon
I missed the first eight days of the dare.  Can someone share them.  I would like to start from the beginning.
1/14/2010 10:02:19 AM
Holly United States
Holly
Today must be a hard day for everyone.  I posted yesterday that my marriage has completely changed for the good even on day 8, but this morning I got up and was like I don't want to do this anymore.  I prayed immediatly that God would give me strength to read today's dare anyway.  I did and I do want to continue the love dare until day 40. I am sad at reading the posts and I think Satan knows that a multitude of people are wanting to bring God into their lives and marriage and he doesn't want that and I know he will try to make it worse each day.  I pray that we can each seek God first before our feet hit the floor and ask Him to give us the strenght to complete this love dare.
1/14/2010 10:08:31 AM
A United States
A
Tina,

I feel the same as you do.  My husband completely ignores me.  I am merely a roommate that sleep on my side of the same King sized bed.  I have practically begged my husband to do this with me.  We actually have the book.  I have asked about counseling, anything to fix our marriage.  He doesn't think there is a problem.  He believes I am the only one with the problem because I am the one that is unhappy.  This past Christmas, I gave him an ultimatum to read the book or go to a counseling session with me or I was leaving.  Of course, I chickened out as usual.  I have nowhere to go.  I have always been an unwanted outsider in my own family.  My mom, stepdad and half sister were the family.  We were all counting the days til I was old enough to be on my own.  I met my husband, and thought that this was my one chance to have someone to love me, someone I could be a family with.  But he spends all his time watching tv, on the computer and phone, or with his parents.  I don't even factor into the equation.  It's been a gradual transition over 8 years, but looking back, I can see that I never was a priority to him, and have been pushed lower and lower on the list til I might as well not exist anymore.  It is made that much more difficult since he is a cop, and our schedules don't mesh well.  I cherish every night off together and the one weekend a month we have off at the same time, yet he barely acknowledges me during those times.  So far all the Love Dare has done is depress me.  I have loved him like this from the beginning and have worked hard to never let it die.  Reading these "how to treat your spouse messages" just show me how he does none of this... ever.  He has never learned to love unselfishly.  He has always been loved in this way, and therefore has never really had to learn how to love like this himself.  I, on the other hand, know how I longed to be loved as a child and make every effort to love the way I never was loved then.  He is a taker, and I am a giver.  After 8 years of marriage, I feel I have nothing left to give.  I thought this Love Dare would help, but so far, I am already doing all these things.  It takes two to have a relationship.  It can never work if only one is trying.  Please pray for me.  I am at the end of my rope.  I don't know what to do or where to go from here.
1/14/2010 10:16:21 AM
tonica United States
tonica
Michael Corbin, I really feel for you! Maybe this can offer some encouragement... Your story reminded me of a guy at my church who was divorced from his wife. He decided to fight to put his family back together. He even attended a couples' retreat by himself! Smile Needless to say, I'm sure he felt frustrated and maybe even foolish with each attempt that was rejected. But this past New Year's Eve, he and his wife remarried and their kids were there and it was so beautiful! [It still brings tears to my eyes when I think about it.] It was so awesome...like you had to know that only God could have had a hand in bringing them back together.

The people that He has placed in your life are not by accident. And I commend you for your continuing efforts to save your marriage and for being "smart" enough to see that this is also an opportunity to glorify God. I do believe that your pain in your current situation is only temporary... remember weeping MAY endure for a night but joy WILL come in the morning!
1/14/2010 10:18:47 AM
Donna United States
Donna
What was the dare for yesterday, Wednesday?  Thanks.
1/14/2010 10:20:21 AM
Kelly United States
Kelly
I am doing this love dare alone.  I do, however send the bible verses via text to my husband everyday.  He revealed to me yesterday that he does not look the verse up.  I feel very alone as well.  I have noticed, though, that as I have been more faithful to this Love Dare, he has been somewhat nicer to me.  I just wish that he would understand how hard I am trying.  I will continue to pray for everyone!  I know how much it hurts to feel that your spouse does not care.  Love to all!
1/14/2010 10:28:23 AM
Tonya United States
Tonya
John, my husband of 29 years and I have worked through some rocky times in our lives in the early days. When I think back about those days (I was not walking with Jesus then) I was not a very nice wife to him, often impatient and critical. Who would want to be around me? Certainly if I could have ran from me I would have! About 12 years ago I came to realize what a brat I was and knew I needed to change. As I worked with Jesus to change me,I found that my relationship with my husband is so awesome! We have our own special greetings when we greet each other and never leave without kissing each other goodbye. I am more accepting of him and love him more. About 4 years ago I heard the song "Shine" by the Newsboys and truly it has become my "motto" in dealing with all people, including my husband and family. People are very open with me and share things that people don't ordinarily share with others because they see God's love in my eyes. While I have not arrived to the destination of "perfection" and I am a lot further than where I was a decade ago! I could not do this journey without Jesus and my husband! Both are blessings that I do not deserve.
1/14/2010 10:39:57 AM
Veronica United States
Veronica
To all of you struggling in your marriages.  I pray for you as well as myself.
My husband and I split up for a few months last year.  While I was gone he met another woman.  Thank God she lived far away.  In the midst of this I have grown in my faith.  God has shown and continues to show me how to be as a wife.  We have gotten back together, not with out a lot of heart ache as well as some fighting.  It is hard to make all the hurt go away.  With Gods amazing love I am healing.  I am learning how to love my husband through the pain.  We are getting better.
Although, he won't go to counseling or do the Love Dare we are healing.  He is really resistant to any help what so ever.  Sometimes I feel like I am the only one making any effor at all.  He is changing his attitude toward me but still has a lot of work ahead of him.  In all of this God has allowed me to see that my life is for him (God) so I need to live for God not for what I think my relationship should be.  I have put my marriage in Gods hands and as hard as it is at times TRUST in him.
Jen and Micheal, I hope you are able to focus on healing through this because no matter what happens it is a hard road.  With God's help you WILL be ok.  I pray that all marriages are renewed through God. I hope you never give up!  Ask God to show you what he wants you to do.  GOD is faithful!!!!!  God bless you all!!!
1/14/2010 10:41:34 AM
Jessica United States
Jessica
I have been faithfully doing the love dare on my husband of 7 years.  He does not know I am doing this but I'm not sure he is really noticing it either.  We have a good marriage but there is always room for improvement and I long to be closer to my husband and God so I decided that doing the love dare would help me improve.  My biggest challenge with this is our 3 small children (4 1/2, 3 and 6 months).  I am a stay-at-home mom and my husband works 40-90 hours a week for an agricultural business.  I feel as though I am the Giver of the family and I am constantly self-sacrificing but getting nothing in return.  Mom is always suppose to have dinner ready, clean, get the kids baths, etc. etc. and I just want my husband to come home and night and help me and be with me, however when he comes home he is out cutting wood (we heat with wood), fixing his 25 year old truck that he has to use to get back and forth to work, or working on some project that needs done.  I am trying not to be selfish but I find myself getting upset with him because he is gone a lot.  We don't really argue but I feel so alone in this world even though I sense the presence of God is with me.  Sometimes I will call him during the day to vent (which I know doesn't make his day go well but I feel that I need to vent to someone and they are his kids too!)  Is anyone else in this same situation??  How do you cope?  What helps you to be a good wife despite the chaos?  I listen to Klove daily and it really helps me as there always seems to be a song playing that I can relate to.  I am praying that God can get this selfishness out of my heart so that I can love my husband unconditionally but I'm feeling like I have nothing left to give...  
1/14/2010 10:49:35 AM
maria m. United States
maria m.
i have been reading the "Love Dare" everyday and writing them done.  my husband and i are separated and estranged  and i don't know where he is. i have written to him and sent letters to his parents home. how do i do this for healing in my marriage and for us to reconnect? i have not lost hope , even though it's been about 8 months since we spoke to each other briefly on the phone, i still continue to pray for a miracle.

since i started "Love Dare" it has really brought encouragement and hope ,even though i can't share it with him.
i pray for the Lord to soften his heart and to make that phone call i have been waiting for and  return home.
1/14/2010 11:01:42 AM
Kristina United States
Kristina
Jenn- You are so brave! I think this dare is hard enough even with things going pretty well in my marriage. I just prayed for you, and tht the Lord would soften your husband's heart. You are amazing for staying strong and being willing to pray for reconciliation and restoration even in the face of hearing such harsh words. God bless you and your marriage!
1/14/2010 11:14:45 AM
Amanda United States
Amanda
To anyone feeling like giving up:

I am 24 years old and have been married for a little over one year.  My parents, who have been married for over 30 years, are calling it quits on their broken marriage.  Sometimes I wonder if there are moments they look back on, wondering if they really gave it their all.   My best guess would be that they have lots of these memories -- memories which when they think about how they handled a situation, they would definitely change things if they had it to do over.  

The wonderful thing about living in Christ is that we can live with no regrets.  When we are in God's will, we never have to look back and say, "What if I had done things that way?"

I have been through the Love Dare with my husband, and it was a wonderful tool that brought a greater level of unity and thoughtfulness into our marriage.  

Don't have any regrets.  If you don't think you've given things your all, keep going.  There are so many people rooting you on -- including your heavenly Father.  

Lisa, the story you shared about your own marriage is so inspiring.  Thank you so much.
1/14/2010 11:26:16 AM
Rebecca United States
Rebecca
As I continue to do this Dare every day, I learn something new about myself.  It's so awesome!  My husband still does not know that I'm doing it, but I like it that way.  Like Jamie said, it allows me to focus on my behavior towards him and my love for him and not his towards me.  I can see something new taking shape in our marriage and I like it.  I'm so excited as to where this will take us.  I'm also really looking forward to giving him this journal at the end.  

Lord, give us all the strength to keep going.  Especially those that are ready to give up...I lift them up to you Lord.  
1/14/2010 12:12:20 PM
monica United States
monica
My husband and I are on our 9th day. It has been very challenging for us. See my husband is not saved but through all my prayers he agreed to do this with me. The first day he absolutly laughed at me and said I need to stop reading these crazy books. So I thought I was on this on my own. Thanks to God he started seeing a different person in me and then he wanted in. So I believe that Jesus is really touching our marriage.So I am here to say to whoever wants to give up don't all you have to do is pray and  put Jesus first in your life.I will continue the journy and and I pray that it works for you all as well. God Bless everyone.
1/14/2010 12:12:44 PM
Becky United States
Becky
I work in a nursing home, and one of the hats I wear is in IT, the phone system and anything else computerized or technical.  We recently started using our overhead speaker system to broadcast music.  Since the system is operated from my office, I chose to play K-Love.  It has been playing in the halls since January 1st, and not one person has requested a channel change!  Not only that, but people who don't go to church have been talking about the Love Dare!!  I'll keep playing it, and pray that God works in the lives of the residents and staff members who need him most!!

It's also great to hear believers singing God's music while they are caring for our elderly!!
1/14/2010 12:43:32 PM
Stephanie United States
Stephanie
Well my husband left me right before I started the love dare last week. He is going through something terrible and the devil has a hold on him. He has backed away from me completely. Im not sure if he is coming back, but I have faithfully been doing the love dare as much as I possibly can through texting. It is getting VERY hard for me becuase he gives me no response or feedback. I refuse to give up. I still believe that God can work in miraculous ways to pull this marriage back where God wants it to be. Please pray for my family and marriage, let him know he is loved no matter what he is going through.
1/14/2010 1:06:12 PM
Vicki United States
Vicki
This comment is for "I Tried".  I read your comment on the Kay Love website and my heart becamse heavy.  Please don't give up.  Remember our time on this earth is only temporary and our reward in Heaven is for eternity.  Love your husband as Christ loves him.  Do the love dare because it is the right thing to do.  Don't try to change your husband, let God do that.  Be the wife that God wants you to be. I understand how you feel because I feel that way too.  I feel like I kept our marriage together and I have always been the one to care about our relationship.  I get weary and feel like if I don't try then our marriage will die.  However, Idecided that even if my husband didn't participate in this challenge that I was still going to.  I know that God can teach me things as well.  I will pray for you to have strength to continue this challenge on your own.  God will give you strength.
1/14/2010 1:14:53 PM
Becky United States
Becky
I loved this mornings comments on the love dare.  They were sincere and heartfelt.  God had been bringing the Love Dare up to me, and I was to busy to listen.  When I heard KLOVE was doing it  I knew God was once again speaking to me.  It has been hard.  I forgot how easy it was to forget the little things in marriage.  I am praying God will awaken my marriage and my heart.  I cannot wait to see the amazing things God can do through this Love Dare.  I keeep reminding myself on the hard days, ALL things are possible with GOD!!  
1/14/2010 1:50:58 PM
FAITH @ TRUST United States
FAITH @ TRUST
GOOD LUCK TO ALL YOU STRONG WOMEN THAT ARE DOING THIS LOVE DARE I FELL OFF THE FIRST DAY. TRYING TO GET BACK ON BUT STRUGGLING. WE ALL KNOW THAT GOD IS WITH US WHEN WE ASK HIM TO GUIDE US AND GIVES US STRENGTH. FOR THE SISTERS THAT ARE HAVING TROUBLE WITH YOUR HUSBANDS. IVE TRIED THIS BEFORE AND IT REALLY WORKS. PUT GOD FIRST IN EVERYTHING AND YOU WILL SEE THE RESULTS. THEIR AMAZING!!!!!!! GOD SHOULD BE OUR FIRST HUSBAND. YOUR SISTER IN CHRISTSmile
1/14/2010 1:52:32 PM
Treva Buchanan United States
Treva Buchanan
My comment is to Jen -

My husband and I did the love dare challenge back in November.  I was in the same situation.  I made it a point to do every dare and to journal every day.  However, my spouse didn't see it the same way and after 1 1/2 wks kept forgetting to do his dare.  He'd fall behind and try to catch up but kept forgetting.  I kept nagging him and finally I stopped doing the dare too.  I comforted him and asked if why he had stopped and he mentioned that he would get busy but I was his world and he loved me.  I wanted him to show me he loved me by doing the dare.  So I allowed the enemy to come in and stop me from finishing.  

This time around I am doing the dare by myself.  He didn't know I was doing the dare 'til the 3rd or 4th day.  Sometimes I get a positive reaction from him and sometimes I don't.  I wouldn't say I have a bad marriage but I want more out of my marriage.  Whatever happens, I know what my God can do and he can restore my marriage.  So don't give up!!!  Even though your love is not doing the dare with you, continue on and do it for yourself!  Don't let the enemy come in and steal what God has intended for your good!  If you need to talk, you can email me at: stillme10252000@gmail.com  I'm here anytime!  

Be Blessed!
Treva
1/14/2010 1:56:07 PM
Shel United States
Shel
Today was a bad day for me, just like Jen. My love is telling me he is torn between me and another woman. This woman knows about me and does not respect our marriage. She is telling him she loves him and can give him whatever I couldn't in the past 14 years of our marriage. It is very hard to hear those words. I was about to give up until I read these posts. I want to trust that God is not sending me signs to prepare for divorce. I know that with God ANYTHING is possible and that he favors marriage. It is just so painful and hard to have confidence. I am continuing the dares and the prayers. I ask that all of you please pray for my husband and me.
1/14/2010 2:07:13 PM
Bobby Shoutz United States
Bobby Shoutz
keep working on the men ladies. i was done with my marriage a few weeks ago and started going to church with my wife. she turned me on to klove where i heard about this challenge and decided to do it on my own since i was the one that had the problem anyway. my wife is a saint and i am happy to get myself to do this each and every day without involving her because she does these things each day without having to do this challenge. i am committed to making us work because she saved me by asking me to go to church with her and i found my way back to the lord.
1/14/2010 2:45:29 PM
BJ United States
BJ
Dear I Tried,

I read your message and I hope you are still reading these posts... If you are listening to K-Love and you are participating in the Love Dare then I hope it is safe to assume you are a Christian. That being said... Remember 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. I have to remind myself of it sometimes...
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails.

God is love and He never fails... Marriage is work and it sometimes requires sacrifice. I think that is why the bible says that Christ's relationship to the church is like marriage. He sacrificed ALL for us even when we didn't deserve it and when we didn't love Him... His love pursued us and continues to pursue us today... Hold on to God's unchanging hand... He will carry you through this love dare if you will just faint not!

Encourage yourself in the Lord! He is drawing you nigh. Wont you let Him?

God Bless!
1/14/2010 3:30:30 PM
Mely United States
Mely
Ok, I am going to admit that I have done ok with the love dare so far.  Been on board but this one for some reason, I am having a hard time wanting to do.  I think because we were arguing this morning and I am feeling pretty negative.  The last thing I feel like doing is pretending I am happy to see him Frown Sigh.. Makes me sad.
1/14/2010 4:10:10 PM
Jenny United States
Jenny
My husband and I have been separated for two years, our anniversary is February 14th.A year ago we watched Fireproof together and he went home to her. I have dated off and on but always think of what we had together before Satan attacked our five kids and us. There has been a lot of hurt on both sides and even I (as a human/woman) have a tough time forgetting. As I listen to K-Love I decided to join the LoveDare since I bought the book. Even though we don't live together I have sent him text messages each day after reading the dare. Today he told me he loves me. I though am not sure where I want to be on our anniversary. A part of me wants to forget him but every day I read the dare I feel led to share it with him. I am really just trying to focus on a relationship with God. I have been laid off for a year and God has provided, I may not have a lot of food but let me say..God has kept me fighting for our house and helped me keep the utilities going...I know all things are possible! Thank you K-Love for providing the encouraging words and music!
1/14/2010 5:04:47 PM
Jenny United States
Jenny
For all of those wanting to give up you can't. Go back and watch FIREPROOF. Kirk Cameron wanted to give up. My favorite scene was when he was at the cross talking with his dad about how wife wife continues to deny him and his love and how can he subject himself to that over and over! God does that with us every day. We are constantly sinning because we are human but God still loves us and still wants us.
   My husband and I were married on Feb 14 2006. Separated in April of 2007. In 2008 we watched Fireproof together, when the movie ended he went back to his girlfriend.I don't hate him. I know Satan attacked our family hard. I have four children and he has one, we faced a lot of challenges. After he left, I had times I didn't want to face another day. I have faced foreclosure twice, been laid off for a year, fighting for my kids from previous marriage and still God carried me through. There have been times we had a bare refridgerator (as it is today) but God has kept me strong to keep the utilities on, the house payment is affordable...throughout the past year I have faithfuly listened to K-Love. Hearing about the Love Dare I decided to participate. (I too have dated off and on, but miss what my husband and I had)Each day I would text my husabnd letting him know the dare and what I would do if we were together to fulfill the dare. Today I too became discouraged...because his attitude is of the wife's in the movie...yeah too bad it isn't like that now he would say. He also told me that he enjoys my texts. I don't know if he and I can get past the hurt that we have caused eachother (women hang on to a lot but my husband seems to hang on to more). All I know is with or without him I am going to focus on my relationship with God...He is the one that will show me the way. Satan can be so deceiving and especially today I see Satan working around me. Don't give up!!!!!!!
1/14/2010 6:06:46 PM
Jennifer United States
Jennifer
Jen,
PLEASE do not give up...our God can move mountains and change the heart of your husband.  When Lisa read your post this morning I cried and my heart aches for you.  YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!  I want you to know I am praying for you and for a change of heart in your husband...God's plan is GOOD and ALL KNOWING!!! Keep believing!
1/14/2010 6:28:43 PM
Mariela United States
Mariela
thanks for all the support--to me this is very hard feels like 90 days already
1/14/2010 7:18:57 PM
Judy United States
Judy
To Jen

The verse in the song by Kutless, "That's What Faith Can Do" comes to my mind - "Doesn't matter what you heard, impossible is not a word, it's just a reason for someone not to try".  Anything is possible when you keep the faith and trust in God.  I will pray for you and your husband.  
1/14/2010 7:57:23 PM
Military Spouse United States
Military Spouse
TO ALL WHO ARE NOT SEEING "results" AND GIVING UP!!!  Please do not be discouraged.  You are not doing this for what YOU will get out of it.  You are doing the Love Dare to please and bring glory to God and to bless someone else, your spouse.(whether you think they deserve it or not)  If you unselfishly do these things daily without them returning the favor or noticing, how much Glory are you bringing the Lord by your unselfish act?  SO MUCH.  Also, how long was Jesus tempted and tried with no food?  I can personally say that it is very challenging giving and giving and not reaping benefits, but our Lord and Savior gives rewards in Heaven....and most likely your actions will speak louder than words with your spouse and through kindness and gentleness with absolutely NO expectations you will reap rewards here as well. Do not give up.  You make the decision, not them.  Make it and stay confident and optimistic in the Lord's word!! remember....it's not about what you get out of it...and remember that actions always speak louder than words.  All my love and prayers to you.  Do it for our Lord. <3
1/14/2010 8:26:01 PM
michelle United States
michelle
hey guys
just looking at todays blogs.
Please remember when satan hears us trying to improve our marriage instead of sitting and doing nothing to improve it as we usually do you don't think he is going to just sit back and let it happen.  As Christians we have to put up a good fight.  Nothing here on Earth was promised to be easy.  Please don't give up.  Sleep on it and keep on trying.  My son is a wrestler and I always tell him impossible is nothing.
1/14/2010 8:26:04 PM
kittenleah United States
kittenleah
I was so hopeful of doing this love dare, for myself, to better my relationships in general. In starting this my ex was trying to connect with me after nearly 3 years of not having any communications. I took it as a sign, though not sure how to read it. I convinced him of trying the love dare to improve himself and his relationships. He was convincing in that he wanted to try it and do so because of me.  A week later I find that everything he has said to me in the last week have all been lies. My hope of doing this was transformed from trying to benefit myself by benefiting my relationships with those around me, to a fake hope of the unexpected, back to realizing that no matter how hard I try at anything, there is always something or someone right there to break me down and ruin me. My hope is lost and my heart is shattered once more. I know there is something I am to learn from this but I am too broken to see it.
1/15/2010 12:01:47 AM
Shana United States
Shana
This note goes out to Jen whose husband told her that your husband has given up on your relationship completely and says the Love Dare is not enough.  I wanted you to know that, six months ago, when we first attempted the Love Dare, my husband said the same.  In October, we separated and he filed for divorce.  It took a lot, lot, lot of praying (including with KLove pastors) but he and I are seeing an amazing Christian counselor now and are on Day 9 of the Love Dare together.  Hang in there.  Never give up.  Love never fails.  Keeping you and yours' in my prayers.
1/15/2010 12:52:04 AM
Mags United States
Mags
I am not sure if this will help you all or not.. but as the love dare is very important. theres MUCH more to it..  I am curently doing the RESPECT dare as well, as most men are wired in this way and I will tell you it changed my whole outlook on WHY and How my hubby ticks the way he does.. and this after 30 years together...
Everyone around us has seen a HUGE difference,the change in our outlook, in our marraiage  and in our lives has been 360 degrees..
  if you want more info check out  www.loveandrespect.com  
I pray this will help you all the same way it has changes our lives.. GOD IS SO GOOD! Smile
1/15/2010 12:55:59 AM
Mags United States
Mags
I had a whole testamony written out.. but it got gobbled up ..
..
God has changed our marriage and lives and it is SOOO Much more then before...
..
please everyone consider checking out www.loveandrespect.com

Smile
1/15/2010 4:22:44 AM
Amy United States
Amy
I like the Love Dare alot so thanks for posting such challenge. I am single and trying to prepare myself to be a good wife so I have been following the love dare everyday, my targets are my family and my friends. However, I am quite confused and sadden after reading the comments from this particular blog regarding those wives who are trying to work on their marriage even after their husbands cheated and left them for others. Didn't Jesus said when there is marital unfaithfulness, divorce is allowed? Where is the biblical support for the victim, the wife, to bear all the responsibilities to work for a miracle so that God can change the unrepentant adulterer? Maybe God has someone else better for those ladies? I do hope so. Why would anyone want an adulterer back? So the cheating men get to cheat and then come back to their good Christian wives, have their cake and eat it too? If that is what God requires women to do within a marriage, I don't ever want to get married. I don't think God is so unjust. Of course I don't know all the details behind the stories, but I will be EXTREMELY careful in picking a husband.
1/15/2010 7:34:42 AM
E.K United States
E.K
My husband is a wonderful man. He prays 4 me. He encourage this Love Dare and he loves the Lord. I have been struggling with anger, selfishness, and insecuirty due to my past. And it is taking over my marriage little by little. My husband tells me i am beautiful every morning. He is a very loving man but along the same line he is not perfect.

I dont want my problems to take over my marriage and everytime i try to do the daily love dare something happens and i dont fulfill it. I feel like the devil wants to destroy my marriage and i dont know what to do. How can i just let go of all the hurt and pain i been through? I want my marriage to work, but until i can let the hurt go, that will be impossible.  
1/15/2010 10:33:22 AM
Kierstin United States
Kierstin
My friend who is also doing the love dare sent me this blog page because she thought i would be encouraged. and i have been! Reading all of your comments really have encouraged me not to let the enemy win this fight with my marriage. we are a very young couple. got married when i was only 18 had a baby a few months after and i feel like we both sometimes feel we pissed out on alot of are life. We have now been married 4 years and i do know that i want my marriage to work. im a young girl and can dont know the what would be the encoraging words for you jen and all the other who want to give up but i do know that i will be praying for you all. Just remember when this is all said and over you can say i didnt give up i kept with it and look at my rewards now. Michael your story really touched me. I will pray for you and your wife and your baby.
God Bless each and everyone of you! we are all in this together
( and like i heard all K love this morning)
untill the whole world hears,
Kierstin
1/17/2010 8:35:51 AM
Jonique United States
Jonique
When I'm at home I make a point to greet my husband at the door. I have been working on expressing love and happiness through my actions and tone of voice each day when we speak on the phone, wake in the morning, and each time we meet up.

It really brightens his day and I can see his eyes light up. He feels love and that is such an awesome feeling for me too.
2/2/2010 9:18:46 AM
EveryDayGuy United States
EveryDayGuy
Hey Folks,

First post. Seems I'm behind most as I started late.  This dare is a climb.  After decades of marriage, things can reach a critical stage where many disciplines are required.  Today she is emotionally far away and I have my work cut out for me.  I'll devise an enthusiastic greeting for her but am pretty sure it will fall flat and be met with suspicion.  Just like the movies!  Bring it on!
1/13/2011 8:38:18 PM
Heather United States
Heather
to I tried:
Do it without him knowing. Even if you choose to quit now, try it again in the future.  I tried doing this dare twice before and quit on DAY 8- TWICE- by throwing the book at the wall! I wasn't ready to let go of all the bad that happened between us.  9 days ago i challenged all my married female facebook friends to take this journey with me, so I WOULD make it past this point. I thought 2 would respond and little did I know 50 women decided to do this facebook challenge with me!- holding me accountable to make it past this day! I had no idea KLOVE was hosting the same thing until now when I had to google DAY 9 Love Dare because I lost my book trying to hide it from my husband! We have laughed and laughed at our husband's suspicion and reactions to our behaviour as they think "what in the world in going on!"  What I thought would be the test of my life has actually become fun. My husband thinks my actions are genuine, not a book telling me what to do, and in return, his actions are making me feel like I want to be genuine-ly nice to him for the first time in a long time.  I really do hope you will continue.
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