Jun 15 2010

A Dad's Role in Raising Boys

With Father's Day around the corner, we dig into the topic of a father's role in raising boys.  David Thomas, who co-wrote the book "Wild Things: The Art of Nurturing Boys" with Stephen James, joins us this morning to talk about this important role.

David Thomas is a therapist and director of counseling for men and boys at Daystar Counseling in Nashville, Tennessee. He lives in Nashville with his wife, Connie; daughter, Lily; and twins, Baker and Witt.

 

 

5 Stages of a boy's development

1) The Explorer (ages 2-4) - As soon as a boy can walk and talk, he begins exploring the edges of his world.

2) The Lover (ages 5-8) - A boy at this stage is more sensitive to the feelings and needs of others around him, and he begins to experience his first spiritual awakening.

3) The Individual (ages 9-12) - Boys at this stage are developing a stronger sense of self and have started to consider what it means to be a man.

4) The Wanderer (ages 13-17) - At this stage, a boy will careen back and forth between his desire for adult involvement and his desire to be left alone.

5) The Warrior (ages 18-22) - Boys at this stage are full of promise, purpose, and insight in the homestretch of a long journey.

Jun 14 2010

Summer Help for Parents

If your kids are already feeling restless this summer, take some tips from teachers on how to bring order to your home:

1) Set up Routines - Routines and standards help children know what's expected of them, so they have a better chance for success.

2) Aim High - Don't be afraid to set high goals and expectations for your kids to accomplish this summer.  When they hit them, they'll feel a sense of accomplishment and want to do more!

3) Streamline Your Discipline - Make sure your children know what you expect from them behavior wise.  Also make sure they know what the consequences are if they break the rules. 

4) Show Them You Care - The best teachers are firm, but loving.  Same goes for the best parents.  So, even though you have boundaries in place, love your children lavishly!

5) Take Advantage of Your Child's Desire to Please You - Children also love striving for goals, which gives you a wonderful opportunity to be their cheerleader. 

To dig deeper on these ideas and more, check out our friends at iMoms.

May 27 2010

Tony Dungy

Tony Dungy has been a success on and off the football field - he won a Super Bowl as a player in 1978 with the Pittsburgh Steelers and became the first African American head coach to win a Super Bowl with the Colts in 2007.  He's a tremendous man of God involved in numerous charities and author of the books Uncommon and Quiet Strength.  In addition to being an analyst for NBC's Football Night in America he also serves as a national spokesman for the website All Pro Dad.

Today, Tony joins us to help "coach" us through life's transitions. If you missed the conversation, click the links below to listen:

Tony shares advice for graduates

Tony coaches us through life's transitions (help for Brett Farve :-))

May 24 2010

For Parents of Grads - Dwight Bain

Life Coach Dwight Bain  is on with us this morning with tips on helping parents transition through the different seasons of their child's life - especially those who have a child graduating this year.  Here are Dwight's "Parenting Stages and strategies necessary to build strong kids":

 

Birth to puberty, (ages 0-12)-

 

Kids need a 'Caretaker' who can teach and help with daily tasks while the child gradually is learning these skills from their parent through positive role modeling, especially in the important areas of self-discipline and responsibility. Other ways for a child to grow in confidence and strength during these years is to help them find social connection and friends through school activities, church groups, youth sports or scouting. This higher level of involvement also connects kids with other healthy adults who can help kids learn even more because of teachers, coaches, and pastors who are investing into their young lives as they grow to the next level of maturity and future success. 

 

Puberty to College Years, (12-21)-

The parenting strategy to use during the teen years is a combination of part Counselor and part Coach to help guide through the emotional issues of building relationships and dealing with hurt feelings; while balancing the tasks of learning to deal with difficulties in life and making wise educational or career choices. Psychologist John Trent calls this process ‘soft love mixed with hard love’, (For more on this concept of parenting, check out “The Two Sides of Love” published by Focus on the Family Publishing, 1999)

 

College years to Adulthood, (21-30)-

 

I believe that we always need our parents- it’s just that the need changes as we grow older. Little kids need a parent to help with personal hygiene, teens need their parents to help them develop healthy habits and by this stage young adults need honest advice and direction. These years are a great time for the parent/adult-child relationship to prosper since the young adult is out on their own dealing with life, yet still needs a 'Consultant' to bounce ideas off of as their build a life independent of their parents to firmly establish a life of their own. 

 

I want you to know that millions of other parents have successfully launched their child from birth toward adulthood and you can too. There is a sign in the launch control room of the Kennedy Space Center that says it well, listen…

 

“It takes a team- to launch a dream.”

 

Know that you are not alone in this process. There are hundreds of resources available at our website as well as links to dozens of other groups driven by the desire to help you experience the great joy of watching a dream take flight, as well as provide the tools and training to help you if you’ve already crashed to get past the nightmare and not be afraid to dream again about what your son or daughter could be when they launch into a life of their own.

 

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