Sep 21 2011

Out of Our Ashes, We Rise

"Family means putting your arms around each other and being there."

You hear it all the time, maybe you say it out loud.  Things are not the way they used to be.  The picture of the American family is changing.

I saw this thing called “Unmarried America”, it surprised me.

"One out of every two women in America is unmarried.

For the first time in our history, married couples make up fewer than half of American households, a fact the New York Times called "a milestone in the evolution of the American family toward less traditional forms.

The biggest change in the last decade was the jump in households headed by women without husbands -up by almost 20 percent between 2000 and 2010.

The poverty rate for all women rose to an historical high in 2010 --14.5 percent the poverty rate for single mothers climbed to an astronomic 40.7 percent in 2010. Today, more than half of all poor children live with single mothers." (Recognizing "Unmarried America" on

It makes me wonder, what is going on?  Why are families so broken?

I think it’s an opportunity to make a difference.  We can’t pretend this isn’t happening or ignore it.  This is a chance for people who love God and know he can put the broken back together again to stand up. 

As single parent myself I find it really difficult to get involved in church although there are all kinds of bible studies for women.  Primarily because they are either during the day while I’m working or at night without childcare.  Just to go it would cost me $50 per night.  It makes me feel like they want to pretend women like me don’t exist.  We do and it is about half of America right now.

From our brokenness, we rise.  I don’t know about you, but I think this is a great opportunity to serve the broken and hurting families.   America may be failing at the whole marriage thing but there are some people that know how to do it right.      

You see it often in history that out of our failures come our greatest successes.  What ashes are you rising out of? 

Restoring belief in the American Dream

When you look at the numbers of the national debt, and unemployment it can be overwhelming. No one person can fix the problem, but a single family can make a difference.  Here's a story of how two families are working together to restore hope that the American Dream is still alive.

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Comments (5) -

9/21/2011 12:29:46 PM
Linda United States
I read your comments about "out of the Ashes,we rise" and also about the decrease in marriages.  It is sad but it is true the things the way they are today I can understand why no one would strive as hard to stay married.  I remarried almost two years ago after being marrried 29 yrs to a man who prefered drinking over everything else.  I married a nice man who does not drink and I think really loves me but a few weeks after I had desided I loved him. He had to have eye surgery actually 3 surgeries for a torn retna.  He has now been out work for almost two years. Eventhough his eye is now completly healed and he can see wonderfully to pass all eye tests. No one will hire him because he has not work in the last year.  What's the Deal you have people cabablw and willing to work and they want hire you because of laspe of time of non working.  what ever happened to giving people a chance to prove themself as valuable employees did he do any thing to cause his retna to tear No.  Did he get cleared from the Doctor can he pass all the eye test now yes.  I am trying to support two on my salay which I can not do alone. Will i have to become one of those single woman again to be able to hold down a job and take care of myself before I go insane and cant work due to the stress?  Why has this world gotten so bad that employers are not willing to give hard working people a chance to prove themselves?  We are both Christians and are doing our best to trust in the Lord but, it sure is HARD....  Oh yea he tried sucide a few months ago too that really made me feel lost and alone...  oh well guess i have vented enough just wish there were some answers out there and some employers that would give a nice guy a chance in time to save a marriage.
9/21/2011 1:53:00 PM
kelley lyman United States
kelley lyman
thank u amanda for your words reminding me that out of the ashes we rise.  I been so covered with ashes I forgot that jesus will use my pain for his success and glorySmile
9/21/2011 2:32:19 PM
Christin Pivero United States
Christin Pivero
My family is recovering from a "Job" year.  Among all of the regular challenges of children, grandchildren, running a business, working in ministry, ect. A year ago yesterday, my youngest sister was diagnosed with lymphoma.  We live 2000 miles apart.  I have lived in Houston (my home) and Massachusetts (her home) every other month for a month at a time for the last year, until June.  She went into remission in Dec., then cancer was back in Feb.  We did a transplant that I was the donor for in June and at the beginning of July my sister died.  I have had some complications from the experimental procedures for the transplants.  We are all recovering: physically, emotionally, and financially.  The one thing that has carried us through everything, and even still, is Jesus.  He is our rock.  He is never changing.  We can trust Hima nd stand firm on His Word. The following is what I posted as my status this morning. "How do you tell someone that there are times it’s best to leave some of the pieces of your life behind? That sometimes leaving pieces of the shell behind just might release you. You never break apart — you break open —
you can’t get to joy by making everything perfect. You can only get there by seeing in every imperfection all that’s joy.
The joy is in having the Beloved, not in loving what we have."
He restores my soul.
9/21/2011 5:53:56 PM
Ken W United States
Ken W
I liked your article, but am concerned about one comment that you made. "Just to go it would cost me $50 per night.  It makes me feel like they want to pretend women like me don’t exist.  We do and it is about half of America right now."  I know for the at least half of our church activities we have baby sitting services available through volunteers that we plan out ahead of time.   This was done most recently on our Fireproof movie evening.   I hope and pray that all Christians who are trying to get people closer to God are finding creative ways to get all of the congregation involved in these activities.
9/21/2011 6:10:15 PM
julie United States
Amanda,  I think what these churches are missing is maybe an opportunity for you.  "To find a need and meet it."  Isn't that part of your family motto?  Maybe you start a family program at a church you join.  Maybe you start a working /divorced/widowed women's program.  There are strong, beautiful, unmarried women across this country... looking for a place to belong.  You seem like a starter.  Maybe this is part of it.
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