Jan 30 2011

RECALL NOTICE

 
The Maker of all human beings (GOD) is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.
 
This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed "Sub-sequential Internal Non-Morality," or more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed.

 

Some of the symptoms include:

1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
 
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this defect.
 
The Repair Technician, JESUS, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs.  There is no additional fee required.
 
The number to call for repair in all areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R. 
Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure.
 
Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component. No matter how big or
small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:

1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control

 

Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.
 
WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the

unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. For free emergency service, call on Jesus.  
 
DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The
SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.
 
Thank you for your attention! - GOD
 
P.S. Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice, and you may contact the Father any time by 'Knee mail'!

 

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Comments (7) -

1/31/2011 9:17:35 PM
Carlos Guzman Mexico
Carlos Guzman
Tengo casi 6 años escuchando los programas de KLOVE desde Mexico. En estos momentos que mi vida estaba en un limbo,es cuando Dios envía su palabra a través de ustedes y KLOVE.

Dios los bendiga
2/7/2011 12:16:24 PM
nancy United States
nancy
Never heard this before, in this way.  LOVE IT.  Very cleverly written, and whole heartedly agree.  Just love the radio station, and have been spreading the word about listening to it with friends, family and acquaintances.
2/10/2011 4:55:26 AM
acmeaffiliates Spain
acmeaffiliates
Remarkable phrase
2/24/2011 1:05:42 PM
Ian United States
Ian
What a good way to spread the word!
3/15/2011 6:58:26 PM
Melissa Olynick United States
Melissa Olynick
It is amazing what you have found, I know God created humor to our benefit. This post for for us all. We all have unfortunatly suffered from alot of the symptoms. God Bless you.
3/21/2011 7:15:16 PM
Leah United States
Leah
that is just soo awesome!! just had to post it to my FB Smile
4/2/2011 10:10:31 PM
Jasmine United States
Jasmine
Just had to share this with everyone on my contacts: google, yahoo, and facebook!!! amazing, Let all the glory be to God Smile
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