Jan 25 2010

Love Dare - Day 20

Love is Jesus Christ


While we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly.Romans 5:6


The previous day and dare lead to no other conclusion that this.  Thankfully, it’s a conclusion you can live with—today, tomorrow, and forever.


Jesus has come “to seek and to save” you (Luke 19:10).  Everything you’ve failed at and haven’t been able to do, every minute you’ve wasted trying to fix things your own way—all of it can be forgiven and made right by putting your life into the hands of the One who first gave it to you.


Maybe you’ve never done this.  Then today is your day.  “Now is the acceptable time, behold, now is the day of salvation” (2 Corinthians 6:2).


Maybe you did it years ago, but you’ve wandered far from your spiritual roots.  Then “repent and return, so that your sins may be wiped away, in order that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord” (Acts 3:19).  Even if you’ve already made Christ your way of life and have never stopped walking in fellowship with Him, the following Scriptures will be a grateful reminder of all He’s done for you.


The Bible says we are sinful from birth, from the moment we arrive.  “Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin my mother conceived me” (Psalm 51:5).  “All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are like a filthy garment” (Isaiah 64:6).  It’s not as though God sends innocent people to hell.


We deserve it.  We simply can’t be good enough to live with a pure and holy God. 


However, “God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him” (I John 4:9).  “Although He existed in the form of god, [He] did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant…He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:6-8).  “He Himself bore our sins in His body on the cross, so that we might die to sin and live to righteousness; for by His wounds you were healed” (I Peter 2:24).  By His death, He made invalid the very idea that you are unloved and devalued.  If you ever feel that way, you’re not looking at the cross.  He proved His love for you there.


Love like this cannot be fully understood.  “One will hardly die for a righteous man; though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die.  But God demonstrates His own love towards us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:7-8).


Nor can love like this be earned.  “The wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:23).  “For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast” (Ephesians 2:8-9).


But it must be received.  “If you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation” (Romans 10:9-10).


And when you have received this new life and love as your own, you are free to love in ways you’ve never been capable before.


“This is how we know what love is:  Jesus Christ laid down his life for us.  And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers…This is His command; to believe in the name of His Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as He commanded us” (I John 3:16, 23 NIV).  “The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love” (I John 4:8).


He was willing to love you even though you didn’t deserve it, even when you didn’t love back.  He was able to see all your flaws and imperfections and still choose to love you.  His love made the greatest sacrifice to meet your greatest need.  As a result, you are able (by His grace) to walk in the fullness and blessing of His love.  Now and forever.


This means you now share this same love with your spouse.  You can love even when you’re not love in return.  You can see all their flaws and imperfections and still choose to love.  And though you can’t meet their needs the way God can, you can become His instrument to meet the needs of your spouse.  As result, he or she can walk in the fullness and blessing of your love.  Now and till death.


True love is found in Christ alone.  And after you have received His gift of new life by accepting His death in your place and His forgiveness for your sins, you are finally ready to live the dare.




Dare to take God at His Word.  Dare to trust Jesus Christ for salvation.  Dare to pray “Lord Jesus, I’m a sinner.  But You have shown Your love for me by dying to forgive my sins, and You have proven Your power to save me from death by Your resurrection.  Lord, change my heart, and save me by Your grace.”


Write about what this experience has been like for you.  Even if you are only renewing your commitment to receive and express His love, what has He shown you today?


In His love and in His mercy He redeemed them.  (Isaiah 63:9)


Click here to buy a copy of The Love Dare book.  

Click here for a free online journal for the full 40 day challenge.


Material taken from The Love Dare by Stephen and Alex Kendrick, copyright © 2009 by B&H Publishing Group. Used by permission.  Unauthorized reproduction in any format is strictly prohibited by law.


Comments (30) -

1/25/2010 4:56:41 AM
Jenn Bingoooooooo United States
Jenn Bingoooooooo
I think yesterday and today show those of us that were becoming discouraged because of rejection what GOD really feels from us sometimes, and that while we have tried to perform the dares given to us, we are not able to fix this on our own. Only through God can we have life and have it more abundantly.

I have to put my FAITH and TRUST in God and believe that his will, will be done and in the end no matter the outcome He will provide my needs.
1/25/2010 6:26:42 AM
Rebecca United States
I needed this today. I so needed this today. I've not been accepting God's love for me. I've not been looking to the cross for acceptance and love of who I am. I've only been looking at the bad me. The unforgiving, unloving me. Thanks for the reminder that I will probably never fully understand why God loves me and that I cannot earn His love, but that I do have to accept His love. And also for the reminder that we need to demonstrate this love to others. I've never found it easy to do so. And it isn't any easier now. But I know it is important. Now...to get past my pride.
1/25/2010 6:49:25 AM
LETTICIA United States
1/25/2010 6:51:25 AM
Nicole United States
Wow! It hit me hard today. I have to love through all the "flaws" that I see in my husband because God loves him no matter what his "flaws" might be. This will definitely be a challenge, but I'm up for it. How can I be quick to point out his when I know I have so many? Oh God, PLEASE help me to demonstrate your love to my husband--one that is unconditional and to remind myself that even with his "flaws", You still love him unconditionally as you have loved me.
1/25/2010 6:54:59 AM
Jody United States
Good Morning,

Here we are at Day 20...I love that you are doing this...it breaks my heart about the destruction that Satan is doing to marriages these days.  I believe that we have to fight for our marriages and I believe that this which you are doing is making an impact.

God Bless you for your efforts!  We have to unite together and come along side others to encourage them to fight too!


1/25/2010 7:06:56 AM
Melissa Rubke United States
Melissa  Rubke
God is showing me that he is one step ahead of me! Some of these dares are challenging just to get time to do them, or to make the time! To lay down my own desires of what I want to do!
But today God says I am here, right beside you, guiding you through. I had already stated writing my testomony just yesterday. I spent a good portion of the day doing and and had made it to the good stuff, about Gods unfailing love! Without knowing what todays dare would be, God inspired me to get started early!! He is telling me not to give up, it is worth the fight!! I have been married to my husband for almost 24 years, together for 26. Married very young, we now have two adult daughters, and one still at home. Through all the parenting and working, I'm not sure I ever really learned how to put my husband second after God, I am learning now, and choosing to love him no matter what. I am in! Love was me quest for My New Years resolution. To be more loving, and to learn to walk in love with my husband.....not sure what that really looked like or how I was going to do things differently, then what do you know...I hear about the love dare!! God gave me a plan to succeed!! So He is one step ahead of us, he is in control if we let him be!!
1/25/2010 8:35:47 AM
Laura Richards United States
Laura Richards
I am feeling rejected, and I know that the enemy does not want my marriage to succeed, but God does, and He is victorious in all of this! I want to feel that way, too! If you read this, please send up a quick prayer that my marriage will survive. I feel so rejected all of the time. It hurts too much to bear sometimes. Thank you, Lisa & Eric, for posting the Love Dare everyday, and for blessing us like this, so that our marriages may not just be a statistic, but success stories!
1/25/2010 8:50:27 AM
Tara United States
Hope. I have hope. Joy, I have joy again. Every day I complete a dare, I see something about my husband that I love and write it on the wall in the "Positive Room". I find myself spending LOTS of time in the positive room. Why? I let God take over. He is slowly tearing down the "Negative Room". He is protecting me from it. He does not want me to go in, so he sends me little slivers of love every day to keep me focused on what is important. He reminds me that He loves me no matter what, so why can't I do the same for my husband. I find myself smiling and laughing all the time. My husband loves it when I laugh. And I want to do things for him "just because". He was started doing things for me "just because". I look forward to what new thing will happen every day.
Thank you God for what you have done for me. Thank you for my salvation and showing me what LOVE really is. There are no words to express how happy I am!!!
1/25/2010 8:56:59 AM
michael grigsby United States
michael grigsby
     My word is, "IMPACT" ... "impacting" is what Jesus was about... He impacted ungodliness with holiness... He impacted questions with truth... He impacted lost-ness with direction... He impacted pain, brokemness and illness with healing... He impacted guilt with mercy... He impacted judgment with garce... He impacted death with life...  What a Savior!!!  
     I pray and work diligently to be a man of impact.  I'm a child of God, a husband, a pastor, a parent, a granddad, a son, a brother, an uncle, a friend, a songwriter, a guitar player, a carpenter, a neighbor and wear many more hats than those!
     But the most vital and important thing to me, by far, is that while I'm here on this spinning rock called earth is that I "IMPACT" the people around me with the good news of Jesus Christ.  And that when I'm gone that my children and my friends and all who knew me can honestly say that I was a man of "Impact".
1/25/2010 9:30:09 AM
Paul United States
Do you know Jesus ? It is soooo important to know Jesus! Romans 10:9,10 will help you get the job done...Confess and Believe! I'll look forwaed to hangin with you for eternity ! Prayers and Blessings ~ Paul
1/25/2010 10:19:11 AM
Michelle United States
   Thank you for the Love Dare challenge!!  My husband and I get to hear it first thing in the morning on the way to drop him off at work.  Then we can discuss it and plan to implement the dare into our lives!!  Sometimes it takes a real effort, sometimes it is what we have been doing for years and then sometimes it is a game to see who can be more creative in getting the "dare" done for the day!  Those are really fun!!
   I thank God for my husband, but probably not enough. :o)  I am married to a wonderful man who loves me for me.  God has helped me to be able to recognize the truth about our relationship, our love for each other and not to buy into what Satan wants me to believe.
   Thanks to all who have posted here.  If truth be told, a lot of the time I feel like I am the only one going through these kinds trials and tribulations.  I felt that if I am a Christian, then I should be better than to experience this or that type of problem.  That is another lie of Satan's that has a grip on a lot of marriages.
   We need to remember who we are in Christ and live for Him first.  Tell Satan to get behind you and don't give him a foot into your door.
1/25/2010 10:52:52 AM
gwen United States
Hello everyone!
I had reservations about commenting but I think I'll share a little of what God is doing in my life. I too have had my heart broken- i believe we all have at one time or another. BUT(!!)it doesn't have to be in vain, allow God to use you for His glory.
I am 24, moved out at 15, got married at 16 and we have three chilren. My husband and I are still married, we both know it is all thanks to the Lord and his love and mercy. We have both hurt eachother so much and could have rightfully divorced five times or more.
It isn't always easy to love when you aren't loved in return but it's possible. Last year my husband and I were going to divorce, I had talked to a lawyer and started the process. Long story short- I changed my mind. Who am I to not forgive someone (i thought to myself)?? When the Lord of Lords, the only perfect and completely rightous forgives all? WOW, conviction. It is a daily process and involves praying, staying in the word, and speaking life over you, your spouse and your family.
Somedays my thoughts are everywhere. I have to check myself (or the Lord will) and say outloud, "Lord thank you for giving me a godly husband". Pray those things as if they are. It helps me and after praying that for over six years, the Lord is faithful and bringing that to pass.
I know I have issues that need working on and I would sure appreciate my husband to speak life over me.
For everyone else dealing with hard relationships or daily struggles, "And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing" James 1:4 (NAS)
Praying for us all, thank you so much for being open and sharing encouraging words.


1/25/2010 11:55:47 AM
Joyce United States
My husband lead me to a closer relationship with Christ...one in which I never knew was possible!  I hope to honor him by being loving and faithful all the days of our marriage!
1/25/2010 12:24:20 PM
Yolanda United States
My favorite part of the Love Dare is seeing the love of God in my home daily. Starting each day learning about His perfect character is encouraging! Learning from Him about how to love in a complete and deep way, for no other reason then to love. Just the way He loves us...FOR NO REASON!This journey has had difficult moments, because of the laws I had written on my heart. I am willing to let those go and let myself learn to Love with God's Love. I feel freedom everyday in Christs saving Grace...the same Grace that is getting me through the harder days.Congrats to those of you that have had a rough time but are still pressing forward! Let God carry you the rest of the way...
1/25/2010 2:33:14 PM
SC Friend United States
SC Friend
If you're reading this please pray for me and my ex-husband. We divorced 2 years ago and recently failed at trying to work things out. He had seen the movie and I suggested we do the love dare challenge. Unfortunately, he opted not to take the challenge and we haven't even spoken in weeks. (He has been living in another state for quite some time.) I decided to continue with the challenge to try to become a better person. Please pray he will decide to email or call and that his heart will soften. I am feeling very much like Satan is winning at this point. It really seems impossible that things are gonna work out, and I just find it hard to believe that God would want that. Prayer is the only chance we have.

Thanks K-Love for doing this!!
1/25/2010 5:45:53 PM
julia United States
during all of these dares i've been noticing my flaws not my husbands--i realize that i am not prefect and God still loves me--so i should react the same way towards my husband--he knows i am doing the love dare and i don't care that he isn't doing it with me because i'm the one that is broken--i'm the one that needs a better relationship with CHRIST--i'm doing this not just for my marriage but for all my relationships--i always but people at arms length because of my childhood abuses--this is a second chance for me to live a better life--where i am weak my husband is strong where my husband is weak i am strong--he completes me not depletes me--thank you GOD for your bold statement of LOVE :o)
1/25/2010 6:24:35 PM
Brokenhearted United States

My boyfriend and I ended our relationship Dec 4, 2010 after being together for 18 months.  He was not holding my heart gently in his hands; spiritually, emotionally and relationally.  Our demise was not spur of the moment but over a period of two months.  My belly was filled with aches that I could no longer ignore.  I had been rejected, neglected and abandoned<--emotionally, spiritually and relationally one too many times.  I wanted us Fireproofed!

However, all this said, we were both overwhelmed with life issues. Neither of us had a job, losing our homes, no income, etc.  I looked beyond all these things and felt we could make it through all these challenges that we certainly would make it through the highs with GOD.  My boyfriend didn't see it this way; he placed more negativity on things and viewed me negatively while I remained hopeful and believing in him and trusting him and accepting him.  And praying and praying!

I knew having him out of my life would be painful for me and it is tremendously painful.  But it was painful with him not holding my heart gently in his hands as well.  It's now two months later and I have not once stopped ceasing to pray for him.  I need help praying for him.  His heart was hard when we met but softened so much so that he fell in love with me and hardened again the last two months before our demise.

I know his heart; deep down hard and negative is not it.  He is an amazing man beneath the exterior.  His heart is who I fell in love with.  We both watched the movie Fireproof together and at the end my boyfriend looked into my eyes, with tears in his, asking for forgiveness for treating me so terribly and would show me better love toward me.  That was March 2009.

We both agreed on pre-marital counseling which was a positive thing but soon turned into confusion for me.  He wasn't in all the way.  To this day I still have no idea what really happened inside of him that changed a great partnership to nothing.  I was accepted by his entire family as they hoped for a Christian woman to come into their son's life.  There I was and now gone.  I had a wonderful relationship with his parents and feel hesitant to call them anymore.  But I ache to talk with them

I bought him the Love Dare book for Christmas but it still sits in the gift bag in my room. I so wanted to give it to him but he has refused to communicate with me.  The only thing he communicated with me about were the devotional emails I was sending. And that was a simple thank you.  He has stopped me from seeing his daughter, 8 yrs old, and I am broken terribly over this.  He has said over and over I have shown him and his daughter nothing but love.  How can a person shut down so hard without one ounce of remorse?  I don't know what is real anymore, what is the right thing to do or not to do anymore, what is true or not true?  So many Why's and no answers.

Do I call him? Do I give him the Love Dare book? Do I wait in God's time?  

So much loss and grieving- some say break ups/divorce can be harder than death since there is closure in death.  I am deeply HEARTBROKEN.  Prayer is my plea for his heart to soften, his walk with the Lord deepen, mending for us, and a miracle to repair our future that we wanted.

Thank you K-Love and all who read this and diligently pray for us.
1/25/2010 7:43:42 PM
Deanna United States
I am feeling hope! I am feeling happiness and love!  I also am learning alot about my own imperfect self.  It is easy to point at the other person and lay the blame on them.  It is easy to be angry and hurt, but it does not get you anywhere and does not solve the original problems.  It is much harder to take a long look and see what you might have done or said differently to make a situation better, or even make it go away.  I am learning so much about myself and my relationship with God.  I am also learning so much about becoming a better wife.  Hopefully my husband thinks so too.  We have been seperated and are trying to work things out.  we still live seperately but talk daily and see each other a couple times a week.
I pray for everyone posting that things get better for you every day!  I pray that my husband looks deep into his  own heart and finds a deep and abiding love for me.
1/25/2010 8:18:24 PM
David Floyd United States
David Floyd
Amazing Love, that's what it is...that God loves us so much that He dared to show His love even to people who wouldn't and couldn't really and truly appreciate it.But He did and he did it through the Gift of His Son...who showed His love for us through His life and Death. Amazing Love how could it be that You my King would die for me...Thank you My Lord.
1/25/2010 8:29:52 PM
Astalavista Puerto Rico
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1/25/2010 9:31:37 PM
elizabeth United States
As I have walked this journey with you guys, I have discovered, i have not loved as Christ loved, I have not forgiven as Christ forgave. I was all to willing to hold my husbands sins against him. I had taken off my wedding rings and put them away, it was done, I was done but as I began to pray God brought to me the story of Mary Magdaline. Christ knelt beside her not knowing what the crowd would do but he waits and then he says let those without sin cast the first stone. As I began to reflect upon this parable, God reminded me of a time when I had hurt my husband, and how my husband forgave me --and although I wanted to shout my sin was not equal to adultry - the Holy Spirit convicted me and said, sin is sin no matter what type of sin and Jesus died to cover it all. It was then that I realized I had been living a lie -- love does not count and store the wrongs, it does not avoid the other and stop talking - it doesnt reject -- Love reaches out and lifts the other and helps them stand and says I can love because Christ loved me -- no I can;t do it on my own -- I am not capable but Christ paid a debt I can never repay and I will never know how much it cost to see my sins upon that cross -- Today I commit myself to let Christ love through me and show me how to love like he loves -- my way hasn't worked but Christ's love never ever fails.
1/25/2010 10:03:45 PM
Dani United States
Let God fertilizes our hearts with His love,it may takes a very long time to grow, including me. It is a blessing that my love always prays and supports.
1/25/2010 10:19:58 PM
Dani United States
Let God fertilizes our hearts with His love, it may takes a very long time to grow, including me. In fact,it is a blessing that my love always prays and supports. Thank you God for our blessings.
1/25/2010 11:05:22 PM
christina United States
It's not easy to love others. Boy my tounge can get me into some trouble. I know God's word says to show the world the love of Christ but it's hard when the world turns its back on you. If we change our thinking and realize that these people aren't saved we would start praying for them and it will become easier to love them. I needed this reminder that God loves me and all of HIS creation so I should love it as well.
1/25/2010 11:16:44 PM
Michael Corbin United States
Michael Corbin
The growth in my walk with Christ and my Love for my wife had been consistant, our baby still hasn't been born and She is still gone, yet as I had been giving things to God and going through the Love dares alone, we had been talking more and things were moving on a good path, until about day 18, I felt things were going to get tough i think, and tried using the excuse that without her here I can't do that, then when day 19 and 20 came I had completely stopped, I know Christ, my wife does not. God had put it on my heart to share with her and I resisted. and again and again the thought "If you really Love me why didn't you share your savior" and after a row of excuses and finally feeling angry and completely defeated, I simply emailed her a simple note and the love dare from days 19 and 20. and I prayed. I don't know if she will respond or not, All I can do is point her to Christ. Please pray for Shira to recieve God's call, and for our family to healed, and of course for our baby. Thank you all. Please be encouraged everyone who is feels at the end, Give it to God, My life is still in ruins around me, yet The Lord gives me Peace I should not have. He hears the crys of our souls which are secret even to ourselves. He knows us best. He is in control. Whatever your situation is, it is what God allowed, He knows where you are, He weeps when we do, yet He knows that if we stay the course overwhelming Joy will replace every sadness
1/26/2010 12:34:51 AM
Armando Diaz United States
Armando Diaz
This journey I have started with my wife of ten years is the best thing we could have ever done.
The greatest lesson I have learned is that I cannot have agape love for my wife without the holy spirit. If you had asked me before if I loved
my wife with all selflessness I probably would have said yes, and now that I know what that truely means I would have been mistaken. But there is light that lives within me and by leading my heart to follow the holy spirit I have already started and will continue to love her, cherish her and build a stronger and longer lasting bond than was ever possible if I had tried to do it by myself. Our lives together have already improved and I can only imagine the joy that we will have with eachother and god in the future.
1/26/2010 3:42:20 PM
Liz United States
I would like to suggest something to everyone. Everyday, in addition to praying to the Lord, cast Satan out of your day in Jesus' name. I just had a huge trial in which I realized how much I was focusing on Satan and not God.

This last weekend my husband and daughter went out of state to see family. I had to stay behind because of school. I knew that his sister was having a get together of all her high-school friends(most of which are also my husband's Facebook friends) and that my husband and his brother were going to go. I knew all that. They went on Friday and came back on Sunday.

A few minutes ago one of his sister's(who is a Facebook friend of mine)friends posted pictures of the get together online. So I was just looking at the pictures, laughing at how silly they were, when a picture of my husband and his sister came up. In it, his ring hand is CLEARLY visible, and his ring is not on it. Conversely his brother's ring is visible and his sister's ring is visible. To my knowledge he has never removed his ring, and gets upset when I have mine off to wash the dishes.  The knowledge that he took his ring off, ON PURPOSE, slammed into me at a million miles an hour took my breath away. I immediately began crying the hard,silent cry (you know the one that seizes up your entire being).
I called an aunt of mine, who listened to me talk about how I thought I should confront him. I commented on how Satan is baiting him and how he is just taking it. She replied, " it sounds to me as if you are focusing a lot on Satan..doesn't that allow him more power?"
I couldn't speak, it was as if God used her to communicate that thought to me.I HAD NEVER EVEN CONSIDERED that God has been working BUT I was allowing my thoughts to turn to Satan. It was so easy because I was always asking God to take Satan out of this, so I thought I was doing right.  My aunt and I prayed for God's blessing on our marriage and lives, and then we rebuked Satan in the name of Jesus Christ. I don't know if only ministers are supposed to do that, but after we did it, I felt strangely calm-in a good way.

I have decided I will NOT confront him or even mention it. That is what the OLD Liz would have done because her hurt feelings were talking. I am not the one in control, my Father in heaven is.

Brothers and sisters, at 4:44 pm I was ready to leave and give up my step-daughter(who I would lose if he left me), but now at 5:32 pm I feel as if the armor of the Lord God Most High is upon me. I don't know if this will help anyone, however I felt I needed to share it.

Proverbs 3:6
In all your ways acknowledge HIM and He will direct your path.


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