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  • Comfort and Grief

    In addition to providing uplifting music, K-LOVE has ten full-time pastors to give you Christian advice and as you walk through the challenges of life. The following are some common answers to questions that listeners have about marriage, faith, the Bible and a host of other topics. If you have a question for one of our pastors not listed below, feel free to contact us.

    Question: "Since our child died my husband and I have grown apart. What can we do?" Rebecca, NE
    Answer: I read once that parents who have lost a child can be compared to two skiers on a mountain, each with a broken leg. No matter how much they care, they can do little to help each other. Each is disabled and consumed with pain. They must simply wait for help or healing. When a child dies both parents are grieving. Because you expressed your love for your child in different ways and because your roles were different, you will also grieve differently. You might even believe your pain is greater.  Let me suggest that you do 3 things: • Find Help: Parents who link up with a support system have a major advantage in the healing process • Tend to the needs of others: You need to remember that other siblings grieve to and you must move outside yourself to help others • Let Relatives and friends help: Remember that grandparents are grieving as well. Focus on Rev. 21:3-4 …God Himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.
    Question: "My friend is grieving the loss of a loved one, what do I say?" - Stacey, IN
    Answer: This is a common question or quandary many of us face when wanting to comfort those who are grieving loss. One common mistake that is sometimes made is to avoid the one that is grieving because of the fear of what to do or say. Put your arm around the person and give them a hug. Sometimes the person who says nothing but shows they care by physical interaction can mean more than all the words. Let the person talk about their loved one and don't be afraid of tears, they are better released than bottled up inside. Avoid simply clichés like, "they’re in a better place now" or "I know how you feel." Even if you have experienced loss, it will never be the same because each person handles grief differently. Remember, it's your presence that will be most meaningful in one's time of loss.
    Question: "My loved one died. How do I get through the grief?" -- Christine, IN
    Answer: Grieving for a loved one who has passed away is a normal part of life. It just proves that we loved someone deeply and now that they are gone we miss them. Don't stop yourself from crying or try to push yourself to get over it quickly. All you will succeed in doing stuffing the pain down and it will end up coming out again later in a less than healthy way. Surround yourself with friends and family who can mourn with you or can just be there. Talk freely about your loved one. Share fond memories and details about them. These stories can help others grieving as well. Let God's word comfort you. Here are some scriptures for you to meditate on. 1 Thessalonians 4:13; 2 Corinthains 5:6,8; Revelation 21:4; Psalm 23; Matthew 5:4.
    Question: "How can I rejoice and trust in God when I have just been told I have cancer?" -- Lisa, TN
    Answer: In Matthew 14, the disciples are facing a storm. They are sinking and fearful of destruction. They are anxious and overwhelmed - focused on survival. Their world is chaos, confusion, desperation. And in the middle of this madness, Jesus Christ comes to them literally walking on the water. Their first thought - it’s a ghost! As if a life threatening storm isn't enough, now we have to deal with evil spirits! But then Jesus calls out to them, "…Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid." (Matt. 14:27) Did He really just say that? In the middle of a chaotic, life threatening torrent? In a storm? Hm... in a storm, Jesus says to experience cheer! Now that’s a different take on life for sure!  A few weeks ago, Jesus essentially did the same with you. He brought you into a storm, shouted to you, "be of good cheer, it is I, be not afraid" and then said, "come" - inviting you onto the water.. You are out on the water, in the storm, rejoicing, and occasionally noticing the raging waves as well. But generally rejoicing. And I think you’ll discover a lot about God, your own heart, and what's really important in life.
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