Jul 30 2010

Kids and cell phones--what age is best?

So, Kelli's son is 12 and claims that "everyone" has a cell phone already--why doesn't he?! At what age should a kid get a cell phone? Advice? Stories?

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Comments (118) -

7/25/2010 6:52:56 PM
sibyl United States
When he needs one.  The longer you can wait the better!  One less distraction.
7/25/2010 6:53:33 PM
Todd United States
My 9 year old daughter is also asking for the cell phone.  I keep telling her that when she can afford to pay for the service she can have her own cell phone.
7/25/2010 6:53:37 PM
Erin United States
My daughter was in high school.  When she was a little more independent and we wanted to know where she was day and night.  My son who was younger was not as responsible in high school with his phone.  He now pays for his own and seems to help.  I think high school is appropriate.  Remember our mothers saying " if so and so jumped off the bridge . . .    lol
7/25/2010 6:53:51 PM
Michelle Edwards United States
Michelle Edwards
I have a 12 yr old son and he has had a phone for a year now.  I love it! It's security for me and for him.  We have rules, such as the phone gets turned off at 9pm during school days and I am always able to check his phone and text messages.  Its great when he is over a friends house or with family and I just want to check on him or if he needs something out of the ordinary.  It has also taught him responsibility and independence.
7/25/2010 6:54:06 PM
Stacyann Nielson United States
Stacyann Nielson
We gave our daughter her first cell phone when she was 15. It was cool, we hid it under a pillow on the couch and when she came in and sat down on the couch I called her cell phone...she was like "what is that"? and then she found it and was yelling "No way"!!  she was soooo excited and it was alot of fun for us to see her react that way.
7/25/2010 6:54:08 PM
Emily Shipman United States
Emily Shipman
A question I hear so much!  I have two teenage sons (14 and 17) and they each got one at 12!  That seems to be the magic age where they HAVE to have one!  It also gives us, as parents, a piece of mind to know that they are always within phone's reach (whether they will answer your text or call to them or not ;->) as they become more and more independent and begin to do more things with their friends and without us!
7/25/2010 6:54:17 PM
Denis Lefebvre United States
Denis Lefebvre
I may be a bit old fashioned in this... but I'd tell my son that he can have a cell phone when he can afford to pay his bill himself.
7/25/2010 6:54:52 PM
Matthew Dawson United States
Matthew Dawson
I am currently 19 years old and I remember wanting a cell phone when I was around the age of 13 or 14. I was never allowed to get one until I was 16 (when I started driving). Now that I look back on it, that was probably the best way to do it. And now I even tell my girlfriend that when I have kids, I don't want them to have a cell phone until they start driving.
7/25/2010 6:55:25 PM
Mollie United States
I think 13 is a good age- especially if his friends do have phones. It's great for you as a parent to be able to get hold of him at his activities and at friend's houses. Do what my parents did- he can only use the phone for emergencies and to call you and his dad. Put parameters around it so he can still fit in, and it can be a reasonable comprimise.
7/25/2010 6:55:40 PM
Jan United States
my parents always said, us kids can have a cell phone when it is convenient for them. They said we can have a cell phone so they can get ahold of us. You could always start your son with a cheap phone, or let him pay for some of the expenses. Our family uses the go phone program where you pay per how much you use the phone and it works great.  
7/25/2010 6:55:42 PM
Alison Thompson United States
Alison Thompson
Hey, I'm almost 14 and I am going into highschool this year and I still don't have a cell phone to text my friends. I just recently got a prepaid cell phone but it is just for emergencies or to call my parents. I have friends who have cell phones and once they get one cell phone they are asking for a new one. I use my dad's cell to text my friends instead so having my own isn't a big deal right now.
7/25/2010 6:55:52 PM
Rick Hartschuh United States
Rick Hartschuh
We based getting our kids cell phones dependent upon the activities and involvement in school.  That way the could contact us when we needed to pick them up.  One was a freshman in high school and the other was 8th grade.
7/25/2010 6:55:56 PM
larry United States
I have been through this three times now.  Each time different.  My oldest is 24 and he didn't get a phone until he bought his own after graduation.  My daughter didn't get one until her senior year.  I have a 12 year old son who got one last year when he went to the sixth grade.  This was because he was taking the bus home after school and would be alone for two hours before we got home.  

I think it all depends on your situation and the maturity of your son.  Definately enforce restrictions on the usage of the phone.  I read all text messages to ensure proper language is being used.  I screen all phone numbers called and received.  After a year he text/calls only about three friends because the others were getting on his nerves. Now my seven year old is asking when he can get on.  OMG

Face it.  Technology is a vital part of our life.  We are not in Kansas anymore Toto.  God bless and good luck.
7/25/2010 6:56:09 PM
Heather United States
I understand where your son is coming from.. I got my first cell phone when I was 13 and have had the same number ever since, but my mom and stepdad did this so everyone in my family could get a hold of me when I went to my dad's or grandmother. My cousin Jordan received her first cell phone when she was 9! I guess it just depends on when you and your husband feel like he is ready to have his own phone. I wish you the best of luck! :]
7/25/2010 6:56:16 PM
Cyndi United States
I know there is a phone for kids that limits what they can do.... Disney also has phones for children.  
7/25/2010 6:56:18 PM
Sharon United States
My son Travis, which will also be entering the 7th grade this fall received his cell phone 2 years ago when he started participating in sports, Awanas, and other events that he was away from me so we could reach each other in case of emergency. The phone was not to be used during school hours though.
7/25/2010 6:56:29 PM
Jessica Borel United States
Jessica Borel
I really dont know i have to agree with him because im 11 and i dont have one either and i think that i should be able to getone too!!!!
7/25/2010 6:56:42 PM
Tina Padovani United States
Tina Padovani
I didn't let my boy's have cell phone's until the were old enough to drive!  But these days it seems that all kids are having cell phones!  My Step-Daughter is 10 almost 11 and her mom bought her on for her birthday last year, she does very well with it as it is a go phone so you pay as you go!  It works for her, it is good for them to have with today's day n age where we are always trying to stay connected.  So you may want to try the go phone way for now until your son can pay for his own cell bill, this way when his minutes are up he will have to wait until you add more! It will teach him responsibilty at such a young age!  I say why not, it will make him learn some valuable lessons! Especially if he looses it!  So give it a shot and go from there! Best of luck!
Tina, Livermore, cA
7/25/2010 6:57:31 PM
Nica Walsh United States
Nica Walsh
Well, my kids got their 1st cell in 6th grade, when they began to be more social and doing things away from us more. I needed to feel that I could keep in contact with them, so they were only allowed to have a prepaid at that time and only use it to contact home. Friends were not allowed to use up their allotted minutes. By the end of middle school (8th grade)though, they both had a regular phone, (even better than mom's)and had unlimited minutes to text or call. But they still need to be respectful on when to use it and not text and be on it 24-7. They are very responsible kids, now 18 and 14, and with firm, loving guidelines, it has not been an issue with them having one. I donot agree however, for the little children 5th grade and under to have use of cell phones.
7/25/2010 6:57:45 PM
Joel M. United States
Joel M.
I would suggest at least waiting till 16, and let him know it's a privilage to own one, if you give in to early or let him own one for the wrong reasons then they don't gain the proper understanding of the tools we are given in life Laughing. I didn't have a cell phone till I got one myself at 18 when I had a job, same thing with my car.  
7/25/2010 6:58:39 PM
Diana Ziegler United States
Diana Ziegler
Mainly it depends on what your child is involved in and whether it is important to have him/her keep in touch with you.  If this is the case make sure it is one of the "secure" kid phones.  I have heard horror stories about cell phone bills that are close to $1,000 because kids download stuff.

If a child is not in this situation they should wait until they have some kind of income so they can buy the phone and help pay the bill.  It is amazing at how much better care they take of the equipment and charges.  My children didn't not get cell phones until they were out of school and had their own jobs.  Even though they whined "everyone else has them" they survived
7/25/2010 6:58:58 PM
Robin United States
Kellie...our kids got their phones when they were 16 and driving.  Since payphones were not around anymore, that seemed very approriate. We could reach them and them us anytime needed.  When in activities with school that was another reason for that age.  I think now adays parents keep giving in to kids younger and younger, so that is this mom's prespective.  Is it really a need or a want?? That's the question you need to ask yourself..because you (his parents) are the only ones to protect him from earthly things.  Have a blessed day and hope this helps...Robin
7/25/2010 6:59:18 PM
Keith Allen United States
Keith Allen
We added our oldest son to our cell phone package when he was Middle school age, so that he could access us anytime HE needed to. When he started high school camera phones were forbid in the high school there, wasn't any texting then either!  Now just 5 years later and another son who graduated, we have our last daughter who will be a sophomore and I don't know what I would do if my kids couldn't reach me when they needed to or I need to reach them.  There definatly need to be boundries, kosher time limitations, not before 8am and not after 9 pm (thoses are just considerations we as adults do when thinking of calling people) Texting is the tricky part now! Our daughter has to plug in her phone to charge in the kitchen, she knows the rules but it's so her friends don't text or call in the middle of the night with their problems!  You'll be fine! It can be a total good thing Smile
7/25/2010 6:59:51 PM
Jessica Borel United States
Jessica Borel
i think that now is a good age  i am 11 .
7/25/2010 7:00:20 PM
JEnnifer Lind United States
JEnnifer Lind
my rule is when he can pay for it, he can have it.  Smile
7/25/2010 7:00:57 PM
joe ritter United States
joe ritter
Are son is 12 too and we just got him a cell phone because he wanted to ride  his bike around the block and or go vist his friend a street over. We tried the two way radios but they never work all time. So its nice to be able to get hold of him where ever he is. Now our daugther was 14 when she got one, but that was 7 years go . However they both had to have the means of paying for the 10.00 fee a month She babysit and he helps his grandpa cut grass and has 1 of his own jobs.
7/25/2010 7:01:22 PM
Chris United States
I think that there is not a difinitive answer.  Like most things it depends on many things.  The child, his activitiies, responsiblity level etc.  We allowed our sons to get a cell phone when they got their driver's license.  WITH VERY EXPLICIT RULES.  It stayed in their pocket while driving. They were to use it to let us know that they arrived at their destination safely.  It gave us as parents some peace of mind. It was a plan with a LIMITED number of minutes.  So if they were used uo for the month then OH WELL>  Oh yes, and they had to pay for it. I know that seems very old for some but I still stand by that today and my youngest is 22.  I understand that if they are in a lot of activities it seems like it would be helpful to know when to pick them up BUT we had phone chains when my son was in band and track and the parents would call the next on the list to know when pick up time was.  Cell phones are a distraction for our school age children. And I always told them if you get these things at a young age what do you have to look foward to.  It gets harder and harder to kids to wait for things.  I say hold out,  You will  Lose any communication you have with him as he enters those teen years if he has a cell phone.  peer pressure is hard but giving into it is not the answer.  I know you will prayerfully figure it out for your family.
7/25/2010 7:01:48 PM
Stephanie United States
I'd say on his 13th birthday.  Once he gets into school activities away from you or where you aren't going to be present all of the time - he should have a cell phone - with restrictions.  I can remember playing sports and traveling all over the state, and we had to make sure we had enough money for pay phones.  Well - that wouldn't be an issue, but I truly believe anyone younger 13 really shouldn't have one.
7/25/2010 7:03:35 PM
Mercy Nakhisa United States
Mercy Nakhisa
Based on whether you think he is responsible enough, he needs to have one. My daughter is 13 and has had a cell phone for awhile. There are times when she walks home from school, hence for safety purposes she has her cell phone on her just in case she runs into problems. (Home is less than a block away from school. Her school does not allow them to have their cell phones on. So during school, her cell phone is always off. She is a very responsible girl and has used her cell phone responsibly.
7/25/2010 7:04:19 PM
Sophia Felix United States
Sophia Felix
Hi Kelly!!!
God Bless you!!! I would have to say that the best age to get a phone for your child is not until they start driving themselves. For the most part your child will be with you and there is no reason to have one. Also to prevent any problems to occur, I work with kids of all ages for awhile now and their cell phones have gotten them into some trouble. Blessings to you!!! Smile
7/25/2010 7:05:47 PM
Bryan United States
We gave our kids cell phones when they were in the eight grade.  Just have $500 saved up, everyone I have talked to has had one of those bills. We did.
7/25/2010 7:06:27 PM
Jessica United States
Hi, I am 16, and I got my cell phone right before I turned 14, one of the reasons was because I was going to enter High School in the fall, and my parents wanted to have a way to communicate with me because of after school activities.  Also I live in Alaska and in Alaska you can get your permit at 14 because they want you to drive through two winters before you get your license, so my parents also wanted me to have a cell phone when I drive, even though I would be driving with them untill I got my license at 16.
7/25/2010 7:06:34 PM
Dawn United States
We allowed our boys to have cell phones when it became important for us as their parents that they have one.  When they got a little older and started doing activities independent of us, then we gave them a cell phone.  It was our way of keeping track of them when they weren't with us.  Generally speaking, they both had to wait until starting high school.  But every situation and family is different.

It hasn't always been a smooth road w/ the cell phones - don't hesitate to make them charge it in your room at night so they get some sleep!  It may not even be them calling and texting - incoming calls/texts keep them awake, too!

Good luck!  And God bless you for your ministry.  A true blessing to our country.
7/25/2010 7:07:06 PM
Erik amaliksen United States
Erik amaliksen
When your child can pay for the contract themselves.  Otherwise they only see the side of "all my friends have one".   That is bigger issue to teach.  IMHO
7/25/2010 7:08:05 PM
Erik amaliksen United States
Erik amaliksen
When they can pay for it themselves
7/25/2010 7:08:14 PM
Erika United States
To be honest i thing 13 is a good age to have a cell, especially these day's not because everyone has one but because you never know.  Of course there needs to be terms and conditions, lol.  First of all, are you finacialy stable, is he going use it responcibly?  Is he a good kid, like responsible and helps out at home or his brother and sister.  You know add to the list, lol!!
7/25/2010 7:08:53 PM
Brenda United States
My oldest is 13 & I am in the same boat with her complaining that she is the only one of her friend group without a cell phone. My reasons for not getting her one are multiple. She doesn't "need" one until I need her to have one. (being able to contact her) She is either at school (there's a phone there), in the car (with adults that have one), at the dance studio (there's a phone there) or at home (where I am, plus there's a phone there too). I think that until she can prove her maturity level, I am going to limit her use of cell phones-including mine. I don't think that giving her something portable that has unlimited internet access without restriction is a good idea.
7/25/2010 7:09:20 PM
Connie United States
I think the appropriate age is when they get their Driver's License!!  So, in NC that is 16 or older.  
7/25/2010 7:09:29 PM
Jessica Borel United States
Jessica Borel
I think that you should get one for him  i am only 11 but i really wanted to be a member is it ok i said that i am 13 im sorry i just really wanted to join a club for God.
7/25/2010 7:11:55 PM
Debbie United States
My kids had to be 14.  By then they were out with friends more and I wanted to be in contact with them at any time.  That was one restriction, they always had to answer me.  They also had to have a job and had to pay for their own....  I did much the same with a car.  We gave each child some toward the car on their 16th birthday, they had to pay for the rest.  We paid their portion of insurance as long as their grades were 3.0 or above.
7/25/2010 7:11:58 PM
Helena Davis United States
Helena Davis
Having 4 teenage kids at once, I have had alot of experinece with cell phones.  First I require my kids to be able to pay for their own phones then I know that they are already mature enough  to be responsible for one.  They should not get it right as they are driving, because it's new and they are completely enamared with it.  So, getting one before or alittle after is best.  I have a 16 year old daughter who miss used the phone and doesn't get one until 18 or later.  The other three have had cell phones for 3 years (ages 20, 18, 17)
7/25/2010 7:12:18 PM
Jessica Borel United States
Jessica Borel
I think that you should get one for him  i am only 11 but i really wanted to be a member is it ok i said that i am 13 im sorry i just really wanted to join a club for God.
7/25/2010 7:12:59 PM
Suzanne United States
I bought my 10 year old son a cell phone, but not because everyone else had one, but because it benefited me and gave me peace of mind. In the spring I started letting him walk the 1/2 block to school by himself and walk home by himself. I started letting him ride his bike without my supervision on our block. So I can call him anytime I need or want to make sure he's safe and he can call me for any situation. It gave me a peace about allowing him to have some independence and freedoms.

I beleive you need to ask yourself a few questions. Will the cell phone teach him responsiblity? If he wants one now, can he participate in paying for it? Why not a cell phone at 13 years old? You can add usage controls so he can't use it during school, past a certain time at night, (except for emergency numbers like mom and dads), limit the amount of minutes, texting, etc. I had a tendency to think, well I didn't have a cell phone when....but we are living in a completely different generation. this could be a great opportunity to teach him many things.

I hope your prayers and requests for opinions lead you to a wise decision.
7/25/2010 7:13:32 PM
Melinda Elliott United States
Melinda Elliott
We have four boys and the oldest is now 14. We got him his cell phone when he was going into 7th grade (so he was 12 like Kelly's son). It's a time when they are still under heavy parental supervision (or so I hope!). This is a great time, in our opinion, to gradually give them more responsibility while you can monitor it closely. We set heavy rules for the phone to begin with. You can get a simple phone without internet access or a camera. You can even purchase an extra feature on many phones that allows parents to track the child online as long as their phone is on (like a GPS). There are also features that let the parents know when the child enters and exits certain pre-set boundaries. You can gradually allow more freedom as they show responsibility. I think teaching them how to use cell phones correctly while they are still more impressionable is a wise way to do it. If you know you will get them one eventually, (which being realistic, you know you will!), it's good to get it while they are more teachable than when they are an older teen who thinks they know it all!! Also, it's really convenient for them to have their own phone when they begin getting involved in more church and school activities. Our son is a very responsible child, so I think taking the child's personality into consideration is vital. We also made sure he understands that his phone privileges can be revoked at any time. We have free access to his call/text log and he has to ask permission before giving out his number. It has worked great for us. Again, it really depends on the child's level of maturity but these are some ideas that have worked for us.
7/25/2010 7:14:01 PM
Derrith United States
The summer before our older son started junior high (7th grade here in Oregon), we told him we'd get him a cell phone if he read the New Testament that summer. It took him all summer and he did it.  Our younger son wanted a cell phone in the 5th grade because "everyone has one" and we gave him the same challenge to read the New Testament.  He did it in three weeks and he would run in and "report" to us what he'd learned from each book. Neither of them are "readers".  We don't pay for grades or chores but I think this was a worthwhile trade.  Their cell phones are their most prized possessions and they tell people, "I had to read the New Testament to get it".  We told them that would help them know how to act using it!  Good luck.  

They love their phones and being able to call or text us for "car service" (to be picked up from sports practices, games, hanging out with their friends, etc.).  We like it to be able to reach them to check in.  
7/25/2010 7:14:21 PM
Jan United States
My kids go a cell phone when they needed to call to tell me where they were or if they needed a ride.  We kept the charger and if they wanted their phones charged they gave them to us each night and we would charge them (after dinner before homework they were done.  Weekends and summer it was 8 pm they were done calling and texting.  Thanks, keep up the great work.
7/25/2010 7:14:41 PM
Ruth Kaufhold United States
Ruth Kaufhold
This is something that can be controlled and monitored by the parent with newer plans but what are you "teaching" your child with the cell phone?  One thing that all teenagers learn is "my money".  If you connect the cell phone to their allowance or even require they get a job to pay for their plan, you are teaching them the first steps to independence and not living beyond their means.  With each "text message" may come extra charges??  I've known kids who have "run up" their parents bill by going over the minutes and text limits.  This just not like a "style" they have to have...there is serious money associated with it.   Good Luck.
7/25/2010 7:14:43 PM
Terri United States
Both of my children got cell phones in the ninth grade (high school) because they were in high school athletics. Otherwise they would have received a cell phone when they got their drivers license. Any middle schooler will not be anywhere that an adult with the group is not present. A cell phone for a middle schooler is just an expensive toy.
7/25/2010 7:15:23 PM
Karen Bigaouette United States
Karen Bigaouette
Kelli, I have 4 grand children in 1 family and I bought and pay for 1 cell phone for them to use. The oldest will be 14 in August, twins 10 and a 8yr. old. I purchased the phone for them to use when they are away from the house, spending the night with a friend, ball practice after school so they can call for pickup, the 14 old carries it to school but all of them check it at the door when they come home and mom keeps until one of them is going somewhere that it is appropriate that they take it. They have 200 texts a year to contact mostly mom or me, there are many rules that go with this phone but it does come in handy. No internet on the phone and not sitting around the house with their heads burried in a phone. I am thinking about getting the almost 14 her own phone but she will be under the same rules, when you at home mom has the phone.
7/25/2010 7:15:39 PM
Kelsey United States
I think that a kid should get a cell phone as soon as he starts getting involved in activities where parents are not present and times are not concrete. This includes playing school sports (where kids stay after school and ride the bus to games), going to a friend's house after school, or joining clubs.

I got a cell phone as a freshman in high school, but that's when I started doing things like that. If he's a busy kid, he should have a phone. He might need to call you to have you pick him up, to tell you he got to his destination safely, or to inform you of an emergency. Once the kid starts going places on his own, it's time to have a phone! I know, that rhymed. Smile
7/25/2010 7:16:10 PM
Jessica Borel United States
Jessica Borel
I think that you should get one for him  i am only 11 but i really wanted to be a member is it ok i said that i am 13 im sorry i just really wanted to join a club for God.
7/25/2010 7:18:43 PM
Michelle United States
Hi I'm Michelle, and I'm 12. I'm going to the 7th grade next year, and I'm going to be 13 in the spring. I've been begging for a cell phone since I was 10 and I still haven't gotten one so tell your son that he's not the only one, and I would like to join his campaign. Smile
7/25/2010 7:18:53 PM
Stacy United States
I didn't get a cell phone until I was a sophomore in college! If you set limits from the beginning I think once he starts driving is a good age. But I do think that the younger you are when you get a cell phone the more addicted you are to it.
7/25/2010 7:18:54 PM
Emma United States
Hi Kelli! My name is Emma and I am 13, about to be 14. I got my first cell phone when I was ten. I was so excited! By the time I was 11 there were 2nd graders with cell phones! They are growing quickly and your son may not be exaggerating at all. Every one I know has a cell phone except for the rare few who just ordered one and it's on its way. A cell phone is one investment that kids won't just be tired of one month later. I understand looking into limits on a cell phone for kids but I think you should give him one on the next Birthday or Christmas. If you don't want to buy him one, tell him that he can earn the money. Kids always take better care of things they spend there own money on. Feel free to ignore my advice completely, just trying to help. Laughing
This comment is getting long, so thank you for reading this. I love your radio show.
7/25/2010 7:20:36 PM
roberta oelsligle United States
roberta oelsligle
my yoga teacher has a 10-year-old Daughter that has a phone because they have no land line and she walk a long way home from school.
7/25/2010 7:20:50 PM
Scott A. Hoffmann United States
Scott A. Hoffmann
      Pray(er) 4 Bill Edgcomb & Pat Hoffmann- from Scott Allen Gregory Hoffmann‏

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To Ann DeMarco, Bill Edgcomb, bridget burgess, Claus Kage, Dennis Aaron, George Basily, jose` vargas, Kim Christopherson, Kurt Rice, michael dude, Mike Rasmussen, Motov Time Space Legend, My Name, Pastor Foster, Phillipa Gaston, Scot H., scot hoffmann, Scot Me, Scott Sanders, stephanie doering, Tiffany Ledall, revpal@sbcglobal.net, imabananarepublican@yahoo.com
From:  Tatooine Alone (t_alone@hotmail.com)
Sent:  Fri 7/30/10 8:48 PM
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Dear Treasured Reader,

My Mother is a remarkable example of the “Proverbs 31 Woman.”  And (what I’m meaning) saying- in quoting the/is Scripture of her- is a literal truth.  Patricia Ann(e?) Hoffmann has been: Daughter; Sister, Wife, Mother and Friend (to me) for the brief 69 years of her sojourn here on this despicably lovable world.  I’m trusting God to have that number increased as He wills, and not as circumstances permit.

Pat weathered a mortal “scare” in 1986-1987.  In that year- she’d been misdiagnosed as suffering from a detached retina.  Her right eye was THEN found (despite fatty growths upon the eyelid) to be containing a melanoma.  It was a serious complication; one which could have resulted from dental work- involving mercury (the element,) and IF left unattended: without question, would have caused ½ blindness and brain carcinoma.  That means cancer.

The self-contained tumor had been growing within my Mom’s eye for an indefinite amount of time as of my 1st. year of college at the University of Iowa.  I was 17-18 years of age at that time, and I wasn’t exactly following Jesus with all of my heart either.  And that fact is (perhaps) the most important part of the/is entire piece.

Terminal illness is swiftly and uncompromisingly DEALT WITH in the Hoffmann Family.  Mom was (then) a Registered Nurse, and my Dad (her Husband) was a Doctor of Dental Surgery at the time.  They were living selflessly; sacrificially, and lives which were centered on God, country, and family.  I was existing in a fantasy of my “first true love,” academic experience, and reckless abandon.

Of course my Brother & I were enjoying collegiate lives (together) at the University.  Our elder/est, and only Sister was studying Medicine at Saint Louis University.  My Dad made the call(s,) set the itinerary- and Mom was in Mayo Clinic (from Chicagoland,) in Minnesota/U.S.A. –before we-3-kids were home to support them.

The eye was removed.  The cancer was gone, and Mom was (her 100% Lithuanian) solid as a rock is stone; by the time we’d arrived home/together.  God had wrought Pat a medical miracle, and we began the/is 24 year process of holding our breath.  And God has (FAITHFULLY) seen to it that my Mother not come out of remission since then.

Dr. Julie Hoffmann-Anderson-Iandoli went on to complete her Graduate work in Medicine.  She’s an Emergency Room Physician (specializes in ‘triage,’) and our Brother owns a Printing Business.  I’m pursuing my degree at Grand Canyon University; which is located in Phoenix,  AZ/U.S.A., and am presently undegreed.

A year ago, Pat had her second biggest scare.  A vein in my Mom’s right hemisphere was found to be infected.  An immediate craniotomy removed the infection/portion of the vein, and she was sutured.  The “MIS-PERSCRIPTION” of antibiotics resulted in a reoccurrence of the/is condition, at which point a 2nd. brain surgery was required.  They got it all/got it right: this time.  Mom lost function of her left (handed) digits, and arm.  Her left corner of her mouth was droopy, and her left leg was (also) slightly impaired.

But (& again,) God had seen to it that my Mom was going to be O.K..  Medical miracles; faith, hope, and love: ALL came into play this time.  I’d been following HARD(LY) after Jesus for awhile by this point in my 42-3 years of life, and when prompted: I’m quite able to ask healing for conditions which aren’t life-threatening.

Mom recouped.  But then Dad tripped her with the power cord of the vacuum, and she’d suffered a setback.  She’d fallen on the left hand.  This didn’t improve conditions.  Mom fought back, and Dad cooperated with the treatment.  There’s been a few impatient things said about how slowly the care has benefited Pat, but I’m not one to complain.  I’d lost all 4 GrandParents between Mom’s initial diagnosis and her brain surgeries.  I blessed God-My-Father for remission.  And I still DO SO (in Christ Jesus’ Name by the way).

I had also been in and out of hospitals for a few (say “3) minor issues during the course of the/is time.  Once I had been living alone, and drove myself to the hospital (while employed by A.T.&T.) FULLY BELIEVING that I was going to die.  And there’d never been any source determined for those symptoms.  But I’m my Mom’s-Son, and I’ve fought against that health condition with ferocity: ever since then.

Pat wasn’t “out of the woods” as of the trip.

And that’s what’s inspiring me to write today.

Mom had a fall going down wooden stairs from the deck of their retirement “house,” and broke a leg.  The fracture must have been painful- but the introduction to “life at 69 and in a wheel-chair,” seemed more challenging to her/me.

But she went thru MORE therapy, and was going to be alright.  So “we” thought.

And (at this point I’ll just interject) there IS a ‘personal’ devil.  And he fights ‘dirty’ too.

My Mom was climbing the stairs recently and fell (presumably at the top) upon her left hand.  This sounds simple, but the fact IS-that: she’d broken her collar bone this time.

Now, I’m (1/2-jokingly) not one to agree (with or without her consent) with Pat’s joke(s/ing) about the situation.  In a doped chuckle, Mom said: “I cannot break any more bones or the professionals will charge Bob [MY DAD] with spousal abuse!”

She’s a remarkably quick-witted, and delightfully-sarcastic woman.  But this time: I’m not in the joking mood about it.  My Dad has seen Pat thru the loss of all 4 of (both of) their parents, and Bob loves Pat more than does-he his very own life.  He’s as good a Dad as any could EVER have asked for of God.

But, then again- we only have partial custody of one-another as Family Members.  Don’t we?


I’m writing this to you today in order to ask your agreement.  I pray to God.  My Loving; Almightly, Pure, Perfect, and Holy Father God- (be He forever with you) be asked (aloud or silently) to heal my Mom: “Patricia Ann Hoffmann.”  I’m asking (that) you’d be blessed with all spiritual wisdom; insight, instruction, provision, protection, enlightenment, illumination, and direction (purpose) for your own life’s journey: simply for agreeing w/my prayers for “Daddy-God” to do so.

In Jesus’ Sweetest Name…

Thank you for understanding.


Scott A. Hoffmann

226 Maplewood Dr.

Antioch,  IL/U.S.A.

[Lake County] 60002-1649

© 1.815.451.9735

G.C.U.: ref. #0671493

D.O.B 07-20-1968

7/25/2010 7:23:21 PM
Scott A. Hoffmann United States
Scott A. Hoffmann
Much appreciated...


Thx. b 2 Scot & Kelli- & (as always) be unto God ("Our Heavenly Father,") & in the Sweetest Name/Jesus' Name.

7/25/2010 7:23:54 PM
Jennifer United States
Kelli, every case is different. My son got his phone at 11 because I wanted to know that he was safe walking to and from a summer camp while I was at work. Then my daughter got hers at 7 or 8 because we moved to Texas for the Army and she went back to her grandparents in Utah each summer so that made me feel better knowing she had a way to call for help if ever needed. We travel alot and even with sleepovers it makes us feel better that our kids had a way to get in touch with us. There were boundaries set like no talking at the table in the car or if we were in the middle of something. It was a privelage unless I felt it was needed for safety. You can turn on and off perks at anytime if it gets out of hand.  
7/25/2010 7:24:27 PM
David Moore United States
David Moore
My son is 11 and an only child.  He asked for a cell phone when he was 10.  We got him one but only because of his maturity level.  I think that is important.  To make sure that he was ready for a cell phone, we let him carry around one of our old cell phones that no longer worked.  He learned how to keep it charged, never to leave it any where and remember to take it with him.  If he lost it, we didn't care because the phone was no longer active.  We got the phone for my son because he wanted to go to the toy section while we were shopping.  He has to have his cell phone with him.  Otherwise, he has to stay with us while we're shopping.  One problem we ran into was the phone number he received with his new cell phone was for some dead-beat who didn't pay their bills so my son received numerous calls the first few months from collection agencies.  We had texting completely disabled on his phone so we don't have to worry about a big bill.  Having a cell phone at his age is a luxury but it does come in handy.  Best of luck and God's love!
7/25/2010 7:26:22 PM
Karen Bigaouette United States
Karen Bigaouette
I have 4 grandchildren 14, twins 10 and an 8 year old. I bought 1 cell for all of them to share 1 year ago so when they are spending the night away from home, sports practices to call for pick up, various reasons, but they share. They check the phone at home when they hit the door, no burying your head in the phone, they have 200 text messages to use to mom or me, no internet. I am planning to purchase another phone for Madi who actually turns 14 in August but the same rules will apply until the age of 16. The phone we have now does go to school with Madi but she is not permitted to use it except emergencies (school being what it is these days it is a safety factor) but mom and dad do control usage strictly.
7/25/2010 7:29:29 PM
Laurie DeVries United States
Laurie DeVries
Hello ParentsSmile
I am the mom of 26 & 23 yr old women.  I am also a teacher 15 years high school and recently led to move to our local jr. high.  I share this background because not to long ago we had the same conversation with our girls.  I'll share as a parent and as a teacher.  
As parents, my husband and I felt when they were old enough to pay for their own phone then they could have one.  They didn't balk to much because we had been raising them all along to understand the responsibility of stewardship.  They began odd jobs and eventually a part time job and just in time to start driving too. The cell phone is important when driving and when more responsibilities/and hanging out with friends begins.
As a teacher, it has been one of the most invasive technological devices.  It is used to cheat on exams, photograph students in the locker room (I'm a pe teacher) and hurt many kids online with the onset of You-Tube.  It also disengages students from face-to-face contact.  You'll have to make an appointment to have a discussion or just hang out.

To sum up, trust your gut as parents because certainly every family needs to be respected for their convictions.  I'm so glad we stood our ground for cell-phones, cars etc., because we are happy to share that our both daughters at different times shared how much they appreciated our discipline and how much they have learned to appreciate hard-work, diligence, and perseverance to bring about the they need or want. They also said at the time, they weren't appreciative, but they are now.  

Blessings to you both,
Jeremiah 29:11
7/25/2010 7:30:28 PM
Karen Bigaouette United States
Karen Bigaouette
I have 4 grandchildren 14, twins 10 and an 8 year old. I bought 1 cell for all of them to share 1 year ago so when they are spending the night away from home, sports practices to call for pick up, various reasons, but they share. They check the phone at home when they hit the door, no burying your head in the phone, they have 200 text messages to use to mom or me, no internet. I am planning to purchase another phone for Madi who actually turns 14 in August but the same rules will apply until the age of 16. The phone we have now does go to school with Madi but she is not permitted to use it except emergencies (school being what it is these days it is a safety factor) but mom and dad do control usage strictly.
7/25/2010 7:30:45 PM
Becky United States
I have a daughter who is 13 and is going into the eighth grade. She has been begging my husband and I for a cell phone for a long time. My husband feels that she doesnt need one but if he is to get her one she will have to pay for it every month with her allowance that she gets. I think kids today get cell phones too early. Just because everyone else has one doesnt mean our kids need to have one. I feel it is up to the parent to decide what age is appropriate.
7/25/2010 7:32:42 PM
Kimberly G. United States
Kimberly G.
I'm 14, but I'm homeschooled(and glad about it!). So I don't get much of the influence when it comes to cell phones. But don't misunderstand. I do "get your drift" about "everyone having cell phones". Seems that at least 75%(or more) of teenagers has some sort of electronic device.
I just recently received an iPod Touch for b-day. I can use the texting feature when I'm in a WI-FI area.
My opinion is that kids and teens under 17 do not actually NEED a cell phone. Why 17? Because they don't have the whereabouts to drive a car where they might need to communicate from a distance.
But if it's an actual need then things could probably be worked out.
7/25/2010 7:34:25 PM
Amy United States
I tried to call but the lines were always busy. . .
Our son also wanted a cell phone very early.  We compromised and when he went into middle school we allowed him to have one.  It was a great way to help keep up with him since his schedule was really busy with school activities and lots and lots of friends.  The compromise at that point was that it was to be a prepaid phone.  We bought the phone and the first round of minutes.  He had to buy the minutes for the phone after that.  He used his allowance or birthday money or whatever money he could save up.  When the minutes were gone they were gone until he had the money to put more on there.  
Once he was driving we felt it was more important to us as parents for him to have a phone so we purchased a phone and added him to our cell phone plan.  However, we had restrictions placed on the phone as far as minutes of use, texting and data use.  I wish we had thought of the restrictions in the very beginning though.  We didn't place the restrictions until he had ran up a nice bill for overage fees and from downloading ring tones and music (which he had to pay for).  After the restrictions were placed all was well and the phone was a good way for him to communicate with us.  Once he started working a part time job, he paid for the phone himself and after proving he was responsible with it, we lifted the restrictions and placed the phone on a different account in his name.  It worked well and he has been responsible for his cell bill ever since and has never needed to be rescued from the bill.
All in all it was a good compromise and everyone wins.
7/25/2010 7:35:47 PM
Gia Carlson United States
Gia Carlson
I got our son a cell phone when he went to Middle School because I worked and wanted him to be able to contact me whenever he needed to.  For me it I just felt better knowing he could get a hold of me if something came up.  I'm happy to report he hasn't gone crazy with it.  He texts but within reason and phone calls are mainly to me and his dad.
7/26/2010 12:36:55 AM
Rhonda United States
I broke down and got our (then) 13 year old a cell phone mainly so we can get a hold of him whenever we needed to & for emergencies. But you have to turn into a detective, and add certain features, etc to make sure porn isn't sent to your childs phone and check the phone log. There's one phone company that has great child protection options but not all companies have them. Besides being able to get a hold of our kids...it makes for a great grounding tool. They just hate losing phone privlidges.
7/26/2010 12:37:14 AM
Preston United States
I do not think that a 13 year old needs a phone really.  However, there needs to be rules with a phone, if he is to get one, and you are the judge of that one.  
My suggestions:
1) He should understand that a phone is a privilege and not a right.
2)He needs to write you out a list of factual reasons why he needs one.  "Everyone else has one" and "I am the only kid that does not have one" are not reasons, they are opinions...
3) If he wants phone, he needs to be able to pay for it...lock, stock, & barrel.  He should pay for the phone & the minutes.  I think that a pay as you go phone is best because when he runs out of minutes, he's out of minutes and you do not get a penalty on your bill and it will teach him about saving & spending money as well as needless texting.
4) There needs to be limits as to usage ie. Not after 9:00 PM, not at meals, not during homework time, at church, at school, etc.
5) If he mis-uses/abuses the phone, it becomes your phone for a week and you will use it accordingly.
6) If he loses or breaks the phone, it is his responsibility to get it fixed or replaced.

Just a few thoughts as a Dad and with a 10 year old that thankfully does not understand the big deal about having a cell phone.
7/26/2010 12:40:31 AM
Carla Elaine Jackson United States
Carla Elaine Jackson
I got my first cell phone in highschool when I was 15. I am 20 now and I think that a child should be given a cell phone when they have activities or events that would require them to need a cell phone to contact mom and dad. I think having a cell phone is like taking care of a puppy, it is a responsibility and a priviledge not a right. My first cell phone was a pay as you go from At&t. Pay as you go phones are great starter phones because they allow kids to pay for their own minutes and textmessages while learning about the cost. I am 20 years old and I use Virgin mobile pre paid phones because there is no committment and virtually no way to have overages at the end of the month. Do your shopping on prepaid plans and ultimately see if your child truly needs a phone or wants one becuase everyone else has one. This could be a great lesson on being content with out the things we "think" we need but actually only want.
7/26/2010 12:42:15 AM
Julie United States
If him having a phone would convenience you (like call you when he's done with ball practice) then consider it.  Otherwise, doesn't seem to be needed until driving age. I could see a child having one if the family no longer carries their land- line. I do see why split-custody families do get their children cell phones as well. In our community, the majority of middle schoolers do NOT have cell phones, though my children tell me "everyone" has one. I want my children to continue to think for themselves, figure out their own problems as long as they can. If my 11 yr old needed me (say he wrecked on his bike) he'd call me to come get him if he had a phone. It's probably better for him to figure out what to do instead of calling Mom to come rescue him each time.  All that said, I do think any type of communication with teens is good, but I'm holding out for 15 or 16!
7/26/2010 12:52:17 AM
katelyn United States
Miss Kelli i have to say i am your sons age, turning 13 in nov. and im not going to campain "get him one, get him one" what i think you should do is ask him what his friends do with there phones. this shows you what his peer pressure is. it comes down to each kid is different and how much you trust him.
7/26/2010 12:52:57 AM
Kim United States
We have 4 adult children and one 12 year old. Our 12 year old is homeschooled and does not have a cell phone yet, as we don't see the need. When our older kids got cell phones, we were uninformed as to the danger lurking out there in cellphone/texting land! When we do decide to give our son a phone, here are some rules I would put into effect beforehand:

1. Cell phone off and in parents' possession by bedtime. Phone off during mealtimes, church, etc.

2. Cell phone subject to random, frequent unannounced parental text checks.

Our (now)19 year old daughter was our first to have texting in her cell phone plan. She was 16 at the time. It was much more dangerous than I had anticipated, and in retrospect, we should have had stringent guidelines set up first. However, I do like kids having cell phones when they're away from me! I like being able to contact them at any time. When our daughter went through a very troubling period, she would not open up in person...but she would text me! I became an avid texter and was SO thankful to have some avenue of communication.

7/26/2010 12:53:25 AM
Rebecca Squires United States
Rebecca Squires
you need to get him one for emerencies only. a lot of things can happen when children are in school.my daughter had an incident where her bus didn't show up like it was suppose to and we were worry sick. get him a pre-pay cell, that way you won't have a big fat cell phone bill and have him use it for situations that arise when you need it.
7/26/2010 12:55:30 AM
Sherri United States
For all parents, please make sure you have your children's cell phone protected from all "predators".  To your child, it may seem like invading their privacy, but I say, as long as YOU are paying the bills you have the right protect your child.  If they are worried about you seeing something they don't want you to see, then maybe they need to rethink what they are texting. Vicky Hicks will be happy to assist you in protecting your most precious gift from God.  That gift we are all called to protect and lift up.  
Here is her information:
Vicky Hicks - Protection Advocate
7/26/2010 12:59:19 AM
Sherri United States
For all parents, please make sure you have your children's cell phone protected from all "predators".  To your child, it may seem like invading their privacy, but I say, as long as YOU are paying the bills you have the right protect your child.  If they are worried about you seeing something they don't want you to see, then maybe they need to rethink what they are texting. Vicky Hicks will be happy to assist you in protecting your most precious gift from God.  That gift we are all called to protect and lift up.  
Here is her information:
Vicky Hicks - Protection Advocate
7/26/2010 1:01:30 AM
Christina Nelson United States
Christina Nelson
I am a fifteen year old girl and while it pains me to say it your son doesn't need a cell phone yet. While I completely understand where he is coming from (I don't have a cell phone either) I think that kids who are my age don't know how to use cell phones responsibly and need to mature a little before actually having one put in their hands and payed for no strings attached. I am not going to get a cell phone until 1. I can pay for it myself or 2. I start driving and (I would never tell them this to their face) quite frankly my parents are right, I don't need one. Best of luck with your decision.
~~ Christina
7/26/2010 1:09:40 AM
Rebecca United States
For sure go in and talk to your cell phone provider and find our everything you can about all the limits you can put on a youth phone and the costs.  then you can discuss up front with your son exactly what is provided and what is not.  So many kids are getting cell phones at a younger and younger age which has advantages as well as disadvantages.  Advantages is just like we wanted to talk and talk on the phone as youth-- times are changing and this is simply a newer way to stay in touch.  Another advantage is of course - mom and dad can reach you easily.  Technology is changing the world and all technology has to be handled responsibly.  There are many young adults that haven't learned cell phone etiquette.  it should not be acceptable to be sharing a meal and answering your phone and texting unless absolutely necessary.  My husband who is a Pastor has scheduled counseling meetings and more and more young adults don't think twice about answering their phones without even saying 'excuse me' or anything...  just attend to the call and when that's done... it's back to where ever they were in conversation!!!  The other concern I would have for a 10 year old -- Is getting what everyone has 'because everyone has it'  It never ends.  The peer pressure influence sometimes pre-empts better judgement.   And the more contact our kids have with other kids often the less and less contact with parents and siblings.  No one can tell you what is 'wrong' or 'right.'  Gather information, discuss, discuss and then discuss some more!!
7/26/2010 1:37:00 AM
Hannah James United States
Hannah James
I say it totally depends on your kid's activities and also how responsible they are.

My son is at home ALL the time; he also does not take good care of his stuff...so I do not feel he needs one; he just turned 16.

My daughter however is not home much due to many activities and that is also her personality of hanging out with friends, and she got a cell phone when she was 13. She has unlimited texting and is told she can text as much as she wants, but she has to watch the time that she "talks"...and she is really good about it.
7/26/2010 1:48:22 AM
magon United States
so many comments and all good advice...im a single mother ..my 9 yr old daughter is begging to get a cell phone ..simple answer is no. my reason ...she hasnt yet understood the concept of everything we get comes from the Lord, whe she fully understands that and when she fully understands what God has done for her then we can discuss phones!!
7/26/2010 2:30:10 AM
Rachel United States
I'm 12 too and my parents are just like you. They say no but when I do get a phone I get to pick out any one I want!
7/26/2010 2:30:29 AM
Elaine United States
I feel having a cell phone is not age driven but social driven.  The phone gives my daughter the ability to call or text me anytime and any place, especially when she needs me.  Unfortunately, she has a friend who was in a situation that uncomfortable, but know her mom just a text way changed that.  Therefore, if you son is leaving your watchful then think of it as a security blanket.
7/26/2010 8:45:43 AM
Leanne Canada
I am curently 19 and I just got my firt phone last week. My parents always told me and my brothers that we could get a phone as soon as we could pay for it. I think that it would be a good thing to teach your son that if he wants something bad enough he will have to work for it.
7/26/2010 8:52:46 AM
Kim United States
I made both my girls wait until just before they started their Freshman year of High School. Then they were allowed to get any of the free phones or if they wanted something fancier they had to pay any extra charge.
7/26/2010 8:55:02 AM
Emi M. United States
Emi M.
HI! I listen to Klove everyday, pretty much all day long. It's always on in my room. Ok, Well I'm 13 & I got a cell phone when i was 12 last year. I got my mom's old one, untill i was promoted to an enV 3 this Christmas. Smile I was told befor i could get a nice phon ei had to show my responsibility with a 'trial phone'. That's my Cellphone story!! Smile
(By the way, my e-mail will probably not work, because that is my school e-mail, but i wouldn't let me leave a comment without it!)

7/26/2010 8:56:27 AM
christina United States
my son is 11 he has had his phone for one year now. to me it is important in case of emergencies.
7/26/2010 8:56:53 AM
stephanie United States
My 8 yr. old is asking & we've said no way.
We decided it would be based on their maturity level...can they handle the responsibilty of a cell phone (not texting 24-7, taking care of the phone & so on.)  If the answer is no - then no matter the age we will NOT pay for it.  If it's yes then we'll get them a decent phone that is to be used for US to keep in touch with them & vice versa.  A cell phone is a responsiblity we believe. We got our 15 yr. old one for her birthday & since then her brother (younger by 2 yrs.) has said when he turns 15 he'll get one but he's not mature enough nor (at this stage) responsible enough...so base it on their maturity instead of age.
7/26/2010 8:57:30 AM
Roseann United States
I didn't receive a cell phone until I was 16 an driving. I think this is a good age because it's a mile stone. There is more freedom when one is able to drive and thus more responsibility. The cell phone was a need but also a privilege. It's hard to go without when it seems that all others around have what we want but going without builds character.
7/26/2010 8:58:03 AM
Araceli Mendez United States
Araceli Mendez
I bought a cell for my son at 12 because of after school activities.  He did a good job with it.  That being said his 7th grade year he finished the 1000 minutes I bought in March before April was over.   That is why I went with a prepaid.   He was told he could buy his own minutes, I didn't buy anymore until June and then it was only $10 worth.  My recommendation get a prepaid if he just needs it to call someone for a ride or you need to know where he is at.  He does well then ad him to plan.  I teach middle school, many have them but they can be a disruption in class with the texting.
7/26/2010 8:58:03 AM
Shannon United States
I think it all depends on the child! Some children are more responsible with things than others! It also depends on where they are and if they are away from you! For example if my child went to stay with a friend and I know the parents of this child really well but if something happens unexpectedly you want them to have a fast way to get ahold of you!
On the other hand if you get him a cell phone and he abuses it by staying on it and texting all hours of the night! If his grades start to slip just monitor it! Take it away at homework time, dinner time, devotional time, and bedtime! I just want my kids to never put anything before God! They need to know that a cell phone is not something that they cannot live without!
7/26/2010 8:59:04 AM
Emi M. United States
Emi M.
ME again....

The reason i got a cellphone in the first place is because I went on a mission trip for the first time, and my mom wanted me to have one to keep in contact. Smile <3
7/26/2010 8:59:56 AM
Hannah United States
i got a phone when i was nine i needed one really bad cause i went places without them so....i say if you think your kid can handle one and needs one get on for him/her.
7/26/2010 9:00:13 AM
Pam United States
Ditto re it depends on their discipline and your budget; our daughter is 13 and probably 80% of her friends DO have phones(she is always mentioning that too); however, she is always with someone else that has a phone and in her case, is not disciplined enough to limit its use to only necessary(to call us), and our budget doesn't allow for the extra cost, so therefore, it's not needed.
We are still battling with limits on the IPOD use. Also, they can communicate with their friends enough via internet, WII, FB, etc so it's only needed to contact us. Cell phones are a big issue at school, if they don't have them, then it's less of a struggle with the teachers constantly having to either remove them or plead to not use them during school.
7/26/2010 9:01:08 AM
Christy Howell United States
Christy Howell
My son got his first cell phone at the age of 12 and has been through 2 of them he is not 14 yet.. They are not responisible enough for them at this age we learned the hard way I would wait until he is atleast 15
7/26/2010 9:04:01 AM
Judith United States
Telephones are tools and should be treated that way.  If the situation of the child warrants a cell phone, then one should be given.  I am an adult and still don't have one!
7/26/2010 9:07:12 AM
Taylor United States
I am almost 18 now and have had my cell phone for 6 years. My parent surprised me for Christmas of my 7th grade year with my first cell phone. It was a way for them to always be able to contact me and for mr to contact them. I think 12 is a perfectly fine age for a kid to have a cell phone
7/26/2010 9:07:41 AM
lera United States
I am 14 now and i had a phone since i was 8 at first i was only allowed to call my parents, but gradually i got more privaliges and now i could text and everything, i dont abuse the fact that i got my phone, and now all but one of my sisters have one and im pretty sure that my parents dont regret their decision.
7/26/2010 9:09:13 AM
Mark United States
As the youth leader at my church.. I know that 100%  of my youth have cellphone.  And that 6th - 12th.  I like it cause I txt my kids with church updates, and versus. They also use it to notify me if they need rides.
As for me we got our daughter one when she went into 7th grade.  
7/26/2010 9:10:33 AM
Sonya United States
Distraction, Distraction, Distraction.
Our daughter went to college so we bought her a cell phone.  The extra fees nickeled and dimed us.  Her extra texting is unbelievable.  Over 800 texts a month.  When our next daughter went to college, we refused to buy her one, as we got rid her sister's too.  She found a friend that not only Had a cell phone but put her on the plan.  It's a shame.  We don't have to pay which is nice, but I really didn't want such a distraction for her.  Her academics are failing.  She didn't need the extra distraction.
Without cell phones, people have to do it the old fashioned way - plan ahead and communicate more effectively.  Everyone else has a cell phone should it be important or an emergency.
So I agree with the one who said "when they can afford it themselves!"
7/26/2010 9:11:48 AM
Aura T. United States
Aura T.
I have a 13 yr old son.  We first gave him a cell phone to use when he was in 6th grade.  I think it all depends what types of "activities" your child is involved in.  On the weekends or after school, my son would want to hang out at the basketball court where we lived, with his classmate.  So, for safety or just a piece of mind, we started letting him use the cell.  
Especially if your child has activities after school, it's very useful to make sure he/she has a cell phone.  What if you're running late in picking him/her up?  At least you can call your child OR she/he can call you to find out where you're at..Right?  You don't want your child sitting there alone & worried.
7/26/2010 9:12:57 AM
Michelle United States
When my son was 10 we got a track phone for him, put $10 a month on it, and programmed all the emergancy numbers and family numbers into it. But he was a very active 10 year old, and was around the neighborhood alot.

The arrangement was he was to leave 5 minutes on his phone for emergancies. If he used all of the minutes by the middle of the month, then he would have to figure out how to get the money to buy them.

He is now 14 and he works a day or two a week, and pays for his own phone, but we still pitch in the $10 because we like to be able to reach him where ever he is...and that was the original arrangement. (we not only have this arragement for phones, but shoes etc. We pay a certain amount and if he wants items beyond what we will pay...he makes up the difference)

7/26/2010 9:19:40 AM
Rebecca M. United States
Rebecca M.
Kelli, I was just listening to you talk about the confusion on the "cell phone rule" Well it is my understanding that of course "everyone" has a cell phone,I remember as a pre-teen I would constantly try to find ways to convince my grandparents to get me a cell phone, I am 17 now and I just got my first phone three months ago, only because I moved out of the house and moved to a different state for college. What most parents and families do not realize before they go out and buy cell phones is that they are selling their relationships. Cell phones become the new way of communicating between rooms in the same house. You lose your bond, as well as a lot of money. I think it is best to have your children wait until they understand how precious life is. So for all those parents out there who feel as though they are confused about whether they should get their child or children cell phones, I would wait, but if you feel obligated to do so, I would suggest you get one phone and rotate usage throughout your children, and confiscate the phone about a half hour before bed. If your children are older, then I would suggest setting a limit and as they begin to work towards their education and proving that they are able to still be apart of the family, and not allowing the cell phone to become what their lives are all about, then I would suggest that as a family you discuss maybe giving more privileges. My family has one main struggle, they let their cell phones control them, instead of controlling their cell phones.
7/26/2010 9:20:38 AM
Brandi United States
I belive it is not the age that a child should get a cell phone but the why they need one. I gave my son a cell phone at the age of 11 because he was walking home alone and he arrived before everybody else and i wanted him to have the a way to call me and say he was home or call 911. We do not have a house phone. He is 13 now and he has never miss used the phone, and with technology now days it is easy to control how much your child uses the phone. I suggest going with AT&T not because i am there fan but because of research as to what the comanies offer. With them you can put parental controls on the phone. It manages there minutes, who they can call and who they cant call, you can block numbers that call them, how many texts they do and how much data they use. They also have content filters so if they have internet you can block out the bad stuff. They can also turn off the childs ability to use there phone during certain times of the day except to call 911 or a list of numbers that you make for them. I have my son's set for home work time to be off and to turn off for bed time. It unlocks for the time he is walking to school and it is off again untill he walks home. They make giveing a child a phone alot easier. But like I said its a need instead of a luxury. I have talked to alot of parents who have given there kids phones and there kids use they phone like mine almost never for the minutes any way, But i highly recommend the unlimited texting they kids love it and use it alot. I felt he was too young for the phone but he proved to me to be responsible with it and I was happy with my decision.
7/26/2010 4:26:17 PM
Rich United States
Another device (cell phone) used to justify the separation of our children from the protection of the home and to take them out from the authority of the parents. (Deut. 11:9)  With that being said, if they are still at home: when they get a job (in a godly workplace at such a young age).
Can anyone see our (western culture) Christianity for what it is?
We are totally assimilated, acclimated, and conformed to the world (Rom. 12:1-2)
As a two-time combat veteran, an IT Security specialist, and most of all... a disciple of Christ, I can truly say that most Christians are clueless as to how the enemy has us captive in this present age.  Come out and be ye separate!  Get rid of your Televisions, Stay at home with your children, Get un-westernized, and Get holy.
Peace and Grace.
7/26/2010 6:03:51 PM
Mr Mark United States
Mr Mark
Scott and Kelly, I'm against it.  
Someone who buys time for a pre-teen probably also pierced the ears on their newborn... does anyone really need to fit in so badly that these 3 consequences are a "vital necessity"
1) the unknown long term effect of "unlimited minutes"  exposure to low power cell phone radio waves (RF).  I don't see listeners mentioning that irreversible danger.  Read the instructions for the phone, you will see how it is harmful to put into a pants pocket because it is not 1-2 cm away from the skin.

2) some listeners seem to enjoy the extra burden they accept voluntarily to inspect phone usage.  One wrote " I read all text messages to ensure proper language is being used.  I screen all phone numbers called and received..."  You're either nuts, or have too much free time IMHO.  

3) Driving while on phone or texting = very bad habit to condone.  No one is mentioning that either.  You see how common place something becomes, we no longer recognize it's danger?  In fact one comment said "my parents also wanted me to have a cell phone when I drive... another said "cell phone is important when driving".  It looks like we are prepping the kids drivers to wreck cars!
7/26/2010 10:12:33 PM
Brittany United States
There are phones and plans available that you can pick like 5 or 10 numbers and those are the only numbers you can call from that phone. This helps to monitor who your child is calling. Then as he gets older you can change it.
7/27/2010 12:25:50 PM
Catherine United States
My bff and I don't have cellphones but we don't really care. I just want one so I can text but whats the point of getting one if your parents won't you have one and your bff's parents won't let her have one. Even if I got one, my friend wouldn't have one and we wouldn't be able to text eachother and she would be upset because I have one and she doesn't. So we don't really care if we don't get phones till we're 16.
7/27/2010 2:13:43 PM
Jasmine United States
I'm turning 12 in the fall and ever since I was 8 or 9 I've asked my parents 2 get 1. They always said not until you can pay for 1 yourself.  And wut ur son says is pretty much true.  70% of kids hav one.  Ideally don't think it's fair.
7/27/2010 4:08:59 PM
Hannah C. United States
Hannah C.
Hi kelli, I'm 11 and have had a phone 4 a year. At first my parents didn't like the idea, but now it makes them and myself feel safe knowing I can contact them anywhere, anytime if I need when I'm not with them. Plus its fun to be able to text friends. A lot of kids in my grade had phones by 3rd grade. That's a little early. Now I feel safer about going places without my parents. Plus it gives my parents something else to ground me from so I listen more.
7/28/2010 1:50:00 AM
Claire United States
Of, course...myself I wouldn't give it to them until there 13 years of age. If they were younger and I gave it to them. First...is because of safety reasons!
7/29/2010 1:21:59 AM
bonnie United States
after a lot of thought i think age 15-16 is early enough, the reason is get the child through jr high,because cell phones are a big distraction and kids become numb to  everyone and everything around them, besides he's not everyone else, he is unique and God has a plan unique to him.
7/29/2010 2:49:42 AM
Rebekah United States
in my house we can not have a phone until we can pay for the bills
7/29/2010 5:10:57 PM
Kelli S United States
Kelli S
The age of a kid is less important than the situation and responsibility level of the kid.  My nephew is now 10 and he had a "migo" phone since he was 5 or 6.  Those phones allow the parent to program in 4 numbers that can be called, plus an emergency nine-one-one button.  That's it.  It had about 6 buttons on it.  He recently upgraded to a normal cell phone with parent protection in place. I don't know the details on that, but he's doing well with it.

The reason he needed a cell phone is that my sister is very hard to get a hold of.  My dad and step mom are doing most of the parenting and they needed him to be able to get a hold of them if my sister, say, forgot to pick him up from school.  Or they needed to get a hold of him to make sure he's ready for church.
7/30/2010 6:53:17 AM
Claire United States
Kelli! Really, I wouldn't give them a cell phone until they are 13! If, I gave it to them younger them 13. That would be because, they need it for emergencies, and if they went places without me to keep in contact!
7/30/2010 5:24:38 PM
Tony United States
It all has to do with convenience and need. When you need to get a hold of you kids and it’s inconvenient for them to get to a phone to call you then you need to get them a phone. In my house it is just my 10 yr old daughter and me. She has had a phone for 2 yrs now but that was to insure she could always get in touch with me when she was at the sitters. It has helped keep me informed about my daughter. She has just started texting the last 6 months to her best friend who is 3 yrs older. If phone is a convenience & not a necessity then wait for maturity and put limits on it. Use it as a learning tool.
7/30/2010 5:32:28 PM
Saron Gebretatios United States
Saron Gebretatios
Ok im 13 and  my parents bought me a phone on my 10th birthday and of cource i was so exited!, but I also didnt know what to do with it I think the best age is about 12 because they start middle school and it doesnt have to be a fancy smancy cell phone just a cell phone that you can use to call mom or dad to pick you up or whatever!
8/3/2010 2:10:07 PM
Mica Brooks United States
Mica Brooks
My question is what happened to having a few quarters and using a pay phone or going into a local business or using the phone in the Admin office at school. We have become to dependent upon devices that take away our people skills. I feel that no one truly needs a cell phone. We, as a society, seemed to get by just fine quite a few years ago with out any of the things we have now. However if you feel that your child "needs" a cell phone then it really should be a maturity thing. I have seen a lot of adults that shouldn't even have cell phones i.e. talking or texting while driving, talking while at the counter of a food establishment while trying to order and people waiting behind them, etc. I just feel that we should try and get the community back into the world rather then add another thing where people can excile themselves from the things around them.
8/10/2010 2:09:47 AM
rebecca United States
well... I'm 13 and all my friends have a phone (not kidding!) I tried to tell my parents and they said I was exagerating
9/22/2010 12:13:13 AM
anna United States
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