Day 15 – Read Proverbs 15
The Power of a Gentle Answer
I remember coming home from work one day to a super messy kitchen. As soon as I walked into the house, my wife hugged me and asked how my day went. I told her it went well, and I shifted my attention straight to the dirty dishes.
“You never do the dishes anymore,” I said in an angry tone. Her countenance changed. I acted out in anger. Her response was a gentle one, which de-escalated the situation. She showed wisdom.
The Wise Response to Anger
Proverbs 15 paints a beautiful picture of how we need to respond to an angry person. The overall message is simple: what we say and how we say it matters. All of us have said things we regret, especially when we responded in anger. We will eventually encounter a person who loves to argue. Therefore, we must be prepared to respond in a godly way.
By nature, we tend to respond with anger when we feel mistreated. If they get angry, we get mad right back! Proverbs 15 gives us some practical insight into how we are to respond to an angry person. The answer is simple:
1. Respond gently.
We do this because a gentle answer “deflects anger.” Raising our voices will only add fuel to the fire. A soft reply puts the fire out.
2. Respond thoughtfully.
There is wisdom in giving thought to the words we say to others. I’ve come to realize that being right is not the goal. The goal is never to prove how wise we are. It’s to be Christ-like in all we do. That’s the real goal. And the world is waiting to see Christ through our actions. I’ve had many arguments and debates that were a waste of time. I’ve learned to listen, and instead of responding with anger, a gentle response put the fire out in the argument.
A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare. – Proverbs 15:1 NLT
It’s crucial we keep in mind that every Christian’s calling is to make disciples, not to prove people wrong or win arguments. We can win an argument but lose the person. When we respond in anger, we are losing the soul, and souls matter. God is all about people.
So when someone speaks to us in an angry tone, we listen and we lower our voices. Usually, an angry person is speaking from a wounded place. A gentle answer will help deflect their anger. With God’s help, we can respond gently.
Dig Deeper
1. What are two benefits of providing a soft answer to someone who is angry?
2. How can our words affect our witness to the world?
