After more than 20 years of marriage, the one thing I can confidently say I have learned is that I still have a lot left to learn. My wife and I have overcome challenging seasons, navigated unexpected changes, and carried each other through moments of grief and loss. We are not the same people we were on the day we said “I do,” because time and the trials of life change you. The thing that has sustained us through every season and all of those changes is the truth of Hebrews 13:8: “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever” (NLT).
Marriage was God’s idea, so we can trust Him to sustain it.
In Genesis 2:18, God said that it is not good for man to be alone. A few verses later we can see how God’s plan for companionship grows into marriage. We should look to Him for wisdom and guidance on how we fulfill our part in His plan.
It’s crucial to have the presence and power of God working in a marriage as the unchanging foundation. This requires both the husband and the wife to cultivate their own relationship with God and to then intentionally seek to put Him at the center of their relationship with their spouse. In short, the closer a couple moves toward God, the closer they become to each other.
Marriage is a picture of God’s love for us.
In Ephesians 5 we are given some instruction on what a godly marriage should be. It includes things like mutual respect, submission, sacrifice, and selfless love. When a husband and a wife seek to put each other before themselves, it honors God and reflects the love of Christ for His people.
While every human expression of love will fall short of fully capturing the love of Christ, living this out in marriage is one way we can experience “how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is” (see Ephesians 3:18). As Jesus commanded us to love our neighbors as we love ourselves, loving your spouse is also an act of obedience to Him.
Marriage is meant to be a cord of three strands.
“A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:12 NLT). A good marriage includes a husband and wife standing together, but a godly marriage means they stand together with the Lord. He becomes their strength and the power that holds them together.
The imagery of that triple-braided cord also serves to remind us that in marriage, we stand together, fight together, and overcome together. When challenges arise or battles begin to rage around us, it’s important to remember that husband and wife are on the same team, and that God is fighting for us and wants us to succeed. The battle is never against each other, but against our spiritual enemy who wants to tear us down and break us apart (see Ephesians 6:12).
So, who is in the middle of your marriage?
We are surrounded by the ideas and opinions of other people, popular culture, and countless self-help resources. While some of them might be beneficial, there’s no voice or opinion that should matter more in marriage than that of Jesus. Are you giving Him and keeping Him in the proper place, or is something or someone else in the middle of your marriage?
A Prayer for Keeping Jesus at the Center
Jesus, we want to stay strong in our marriage. Help us to love and respect each other by loving and keeping You first in our lives. Help us to remember that You are with us and that drawing closer to You is the best way to draw closer to each other. Thank You for sustaining us, loving us, and holding us together. Amen.
