Read the transcript from today's video devotional.
I grew up in a believing household. I went to church every week. I read my Bible. I was taught how to pray, at least before dinner. But I actually struggled with this idea of coming to God when I really needed Him. The idea of having a relationship with God really didn't click, and everything that I did that was supposed to help grow my relationship with Him kind of felt a little shallow.
I think it was because I was afraid to come to Him, and I felt like I was too much for Him. Honestly, I struggled as a kid with feeling like I was too much for people. I struggled with feeling seen and heard, and so I would pull myself back—whether it was at home, with my family, or with my friends. I just didn't want to be a nuisance. I sort of lived in this gray space of being around people but never going deep with people.
I think that inevitably projected itself onto my relationship with God. I knew that I wanted a relationship with Him, and I spent time with Him in the ways that I was told to. But I didn't want to be a nuisance, and so I pulled back and didn't go as deep as I could have with Him. Praise God that over the years I've talked with a lot of great people and mentors and spent time in His Word—and that's helped me grow in the confidence of coming to God. Our Verse of the Day today has helped me more than any other verse.
It comes from Hebrews chapter 4, verse 16. It says, "So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive His mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most."
The Mountain of Sinai
I've been spending a lot of time in the Old Testament right now, specifically Genesis and Exodus. Just a couple of weeks ago I was reading through Exodus chapter 19, and I'll give you a summary because it's a remarkable scene. God has freed His people from slavery in Egypt. Moses is leading them through the wilderness. You get to this passage of Scripture that says God wanted to make Israel a nation of priests. Now we know priests as the ones that go between the people and God. The idea is that God wanted all of the people to have this functional relationship with Him.
He tells Moses to get all of the people ready, to cleanse themselves, and to stay at the base of the mountain of Sinai—where God was at the top. For three days they would wait, and then on the third day a ram's horn would blast. At that point, the people were to come up the mountain to meet with God. But the passage also tells us that when that horn blows, the mountain is smoking, and there is thunder and lightning crashing. It is a terrifying scene. The horn gets louder and louder and louder. All of this is God's way of telling the people, Come up the mountain and be with Me. But the people are scared, and I can't even blame them. Up until this point, Moses was the only one who had these moments with God, and this was a terrifying sight to behold.
The Veil Is Torn
Shortly after this, God institutes the priesthood, and we see this ongoing separation between God and people. But then we get to the gospels and we learn about Jesus dying on the cross, closing this separation between us and God. There's a specific moment during that I want to point out, because if we don't understand the context, it might not really mean much. When Jesus dies on the cross, we're told that there's a giant earthquake and that the veil in the temple is split in two from top to bottom. This veil was a thick curtain that separated what was called the Holy of Holies from the rest of the temple. In the Holy of Holies was the place where the presence of God dwelt amongst His people—the place that only the High Priest could go, once a year, to make sacrifices on behalf of the people. That very veil was torn, and that was now the people's opportunity to see that they had free access to God. He was inviting them back up the mountain.
Come Boldly
It's this passage in Hebrews that reminds me of that—that we can boldly go to the throne of our gracious God. We don't have to be afraid, because we know that we've been invited into His presence to go deeper with Him, so that we might receive His mercy and His grace when we need it most. I want to invite all of you to accept that reality—that God has made a way, and because He lives, you have access to Him whenever you want. You don't need somebody else to go up the mountain for you. You don't need somebody else to go behind the curtain for you. You get to go boldly before His throne and receive His grace and His mercy. Enjoy that relationship with God, because it is a relationship unlike any other—and it's yours now and forever.
