Posted on Sunday, May 22, 2022 by K-LOVE Pastors

Reviving Your Marriage

“You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had”  – Philippians 2:5 (NLT)  

Some years ago, Dr. Nick Stinnett of the University of Nebraska conducted a group of studies called the “Family Strengths Research Project.”  The studies identified six qualities that make for healthy families. The first two qualities, arguably the two most important, were “commitment” and “appreciation.”   

To some, commitment is a scary word but is crucial to our success in every area of our life. When we face disappointment, we must decide to live by the vows we made to each other and before God. Contrary to what some might think, choosing commitment is not a one-time decision. This act of the will is often a daily determination to stand by our vows. Why?  

Because we will repeatedly experience disappointment with each other and with the state of our marriage. Trials will come, responsibilities will grow, and temptations of escape may compete for our attention. All these things slowly erode at the foundation of a marriage that once was on solid footing.   

How do we take a marriage that is now stagnating and broken and help breath life back into it? Decide to foster an atmosphere of appreciation and gratitude towards your spouse.   

Here are a few practical steps you can take to rebuild your marital satisfaction in the daily grind of life:  

1.Decide to have fun.

Fun is a choice, not an outcome. You decide your way into fun; you don’t just stumble into it. As a couple, you get to choose whether an activity or event is fun or frustrating.   

When fun is an outcome and not a choice, the quality of your marriage is determined by others’ words and actions. But when fun is a choice and not a result, your marriage’s grade is determined solely by your attitude.   

In fact, go so far as to be intentional and create fun in everyday moments. Make it a goal to get your spouse to smile or even laugh. Laughter is good for the soul. Proverbs 17:22 says, “A joyful heart is good medicine.” Your marriage needs a daily dose of laughter.  

2. Purpose in your heart to appreciate. 

Think about the “attitude of gratitude.” Find one or two things you appreciate about your spouse and let them know. Proverbs 16:24 reminds us that “kind words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.”  

3. Build your Spouse Up. 

The words we speak over our spouse can either build them up or tear them down (Proverbs 18:21). Short, to the point, statements can go a long way in building their self-image.  

4. Bear each other’s burdens. 

Life’s burdens can quickly rob us of intimacy. How can you lighten your spouse’s load? Drop the kids off at school. Pick up dinner on your way home. Maybe just offer a backrub at the end of a long day. Do something without expecting anything in return. In doing this, you will be fulfilling, in part, God’s plan and purpose for your marriage (Galatians 6:2).   

LISTICLE  Decide to have fun. Purpose in your heart to appreciate. Build your spouse up Bear each other’s burdens

Digging Deeper:   

  1. How can you show your spouse you appreciate them?
  2. What ways can you honor God in your marriage today?

10 Prayers for Your Marriage

As we pray for our marriage, we understand that we are part of a pair, a pair of imperfect people who are hopefully both learning to grow more and more in the image of our perfect Savior and King, Jesus. We show grace as grace has been shown to us, and we let love hope for the best, and believe the best for the other person, too. We know love isn’t just an emotion, a feeling that we have, but it is a choice we make, and then live out with God guiding us in His strength. Where we are weak, He is strong, and we are unified in His love for life.

God, draw us together as one, may no outside influences distract us, or divide us. May our hearts find unity in You. May our marriage find its anchor in you. May our relationship find its peace through you. May our union find its purity in Your truth. In Jesus’ Name, amen.
Jesus, may we follow your example in our lives together, living in humility, love, and in service to one another. May our relationship echo Your heart and be a selfless gift to one another. May giving be the anthem of our home and the pathway to blessing for others. Amen.
Father, thank you for recognizing our need to be in the community as You exist in a community with yourself. Thank you for providing us to each other as a partner, a helper, and an encouragement. May our relationship grow in Your light and truth and draw others to know You. Increase Your glory as we humbly serve You together.
Jesus, You know full well that we aren’t perfect. As You have forgiven us, help us to forgive one another. Help us follow your example of reconciliation to guide our lives together. May that attitude of peacemaking, words of forgiveness and grace, be echoed and felt in our home and our life as husband and wife.
Jesus, Your love stands as the model for our lives. May Your example of selflessness, servanthood, and unconditional love be echoed in our relationship as husband and wife. May You be better known in our home, and better known by others as a result. May we honor You together. Amen.
Father, You have given us to each other to serve, honor, and love. In this relationship, brought together in You, may we understand what it is to be known. As our hearts are sealed together for life, may we be bonded together in You. May the flame of our love burn healthy and unhindered, pure in Your sight, guided by Your wisdom. Amen
Father, I need you. I am trying to love my spouse, but sometimes it’s hard. Please help me to remember to always rely on your strength. Apart from you, I can’t fix the things that are broken in my marriage. I look to you, Jesus, for the hope and power I need to love my spouse. Please help me to abide in you so that I can have a godly, meaningful marriage. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Lord Jesus, I keep looking back to my past faults and the problems of my marriage. Please help me to forget what is behind me and reach forward to what lies ahead. Make me whole again and give me a fresh perspective of the future and my spouse. Amen.
Father, I need to be a quicker forgiver, but I want to hold grudges. Help me remember that you choose to remember my sins no more because of Jesus and His grace given to me at the cross. God, you love me and forgave me for everything I have done. Please help me to show that spirit to my dear spouse. In your name, Amen.
Lord, it is so easy to see my spouse’s faults and minimize my own. As hard as it is, show me so that I can be a better spouse. Please help me to run from judging and criticizing, which comes so naturally. Please help me to work on myself so that my marriage encourages my spouse and honors you. Forgive me, Lord, amen.

Do you love K-LOVE?
Sign up for music updates!

K-LOVE is a 501(c)3 and all donations are tax deductible. Employer ID Number: 94-2816342

© 2022 Educational Media Foundation, All rights reserved